A
female
age
36-40,
*haye
writes:Hi, my partner and i have been together for 3 years we recently got engaged and today i found out that he went to a hooker the same night we told our friends and family the news.whats even worse is that the same day he got the hooker was the day we got the ring. i cant wear the ring any more as its a ring of lies i also havnt told him i know. i feel the most ultimate betrayal and im hurting more than ever.Please please help xx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2007): i am in a similair position to the poster. i know exactly how you're feeling. its the ultimate betrayal.after 2.5 years i have just learned that my partner went to see a prostitute a few months ago. he says he didn't do anything cos he was so drunk and he physically couldn't. i found out from a friend, and am absolutely devestated. i am certain he would never have told me himself. i don't know what to do. he is begging me to stay with him and says its his only mistake in all our time together. any advice would be appreciated.
A
female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (27 July 2007):
 So how did you find out? And are the sources who gave you this information reliable?....If so, then give him back the ring, tell him that you know what he did and you're not sure you want to commit to someone who will cheapen himself, and your relationship, expose the both of you to god knows what kinds of diseases, including HIV and basically cheat on you before you've even gone down the isle. Trust is a huge thing in a relationship and after this, I doubt you will ever be able to trust him again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007): you will have to tell this guy you know. he is going to notice that you are not wearing the ring.if he has been with this hooker, you also need to know that he hasnt caught anything especially if you have slept with him since, so get yourself checked out as well. i would call off the engagement hun and think about whether you can get over this or call off your relationship altogether.i wouldnt stay with someone like that as there will be trust issues as well now , but in the end you have to do what you feel.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007): Im sorry babe,this might not help, but words cant describe.I would of left him.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (27 July 2007):
 You're so right in feeling this way. What he did was awful, and it would make me suspect very much.
You should think a lot about your situation with this man. And, you should talk to him after you're done thinking. I'm afraid you will have a very hard time trusting him, no matter what he says, and you'll have a very good reason.
If I couldn't get over such a feeling and couldn't wear the ring anymore (which is a sure sign of how you're feeling), I would think about calling the wedding off. But, that's me. Think about what you prefer.
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