A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi im in my late 20s and have been in a relationship for the past three yearsbut when im out with the lads and any talkof sex comes up anything at all relating to thesubject i get really embarrassed and my face turnsbright red i also get really nervous anxious and awkwardthis is really affecting my social life as i avoid any situation where this may arise , when i think back now ive always had this problem and it must be psychological because i think about sex all the time and i go over things in my head and i also get paranoid that people know about my secret and are laughing at me is there anyone who can give me advice on the matter or recommend some one to talk to Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tremor  +, writes (30 May 2008):
 Congratulations - you're normal!
The fact that you go over sex in your head is not really a secret - EVERYONE does that.
As :):):) said, your upbringing could well have something to do with it. If it was a taboo when you were growing up, it's natural that you should feel a little awkward about it now.
If you want to be more comfortable talking about sex, realize that it's not anything dirty or wrong. Relax when people are talking about it - remember, //EVERYONE// thinks about sex. That is why people talk about it - it's one of the most fun conversation topics out. It's not just a 'secret' that you have, so don't be ashamed. =)
However, some folks are just more private than others - again, as :):):) has said, if you don't want to talk about it, it won't make you any less of a person.
A
female
reader, :):):)  +, writes (29 May 2008):
Simply, some people just arent very comfortable talking about sex in public.
Maybe you had a strict upbringing where sex was a taboo subject?
If you dont want to talk about it, you dont have to. It dosent make you any less a person.
If you want to, relax and just follow on from conversation when it feels natural to do so, in as little or much detail as you wish to.
If you have an understanding group of friends, tell them that talking about sex makes you uncomfortable.
Goodluck
xxx
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