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Should I tell my friend?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 June 2017) 12 Answers - (Newest, 12 June 2017)
A male Canada age 30-35, *roofStriker07 writes:

My best friend started dating a girl from our college. But I've had 3some with that girl before. Should I tell him this?

View related questions: best friend, threesome

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (12 June 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntNo I don't think you need to tell him, you shouldn't splash her past out to him, at the end off the day it should have no effect on their now relationship.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2017):

Mate, i would tell him. You dont have to go into details but i would. If he is still cool with it then happy days, if not at least he isnt in too deep

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2017):

Judgedick gave you a great response!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2017):

If he's your best friend, wouldn't he already know about the threesome? Especially as you are all at the same college?

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A male reader, judgedick France +, writes (1 June 2017):

judgedick agony auntdon't , it was before they got together , and do you think she is dirty because she had a 3some with you and are you not in the same case , what makes her not worth being his gf and you worth being his friend

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (1 June 2017):

chigirl agony auntNo, you didn't "fuck his girlfriend". You had sex with this woman and then she became his girlfriend AFTER. It's honestly not the same. But if you want to be an idiot, fine, go ahead and tell him. Really though, it's none of your business. You did not have sex with his girlfriend, she wasn't his girlfriend when that took place. So back off. You will just appear to be jealous or as if you want to compete with him.

If he needs to know, then SHE AND HIM will have this conversation. Not you. You're not a part of this. They didn't start dating and then you had sex with her. You are not involved in this, so stop trying to get attention or put yourself in some important role in their relationship. It's none of your business who he dates, whether you slept with them before or not.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (1 June 2017):

Honeypie agony auntWas she HIS GF when you "fucked" her?

If not, so what?

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A male reader, ProofStriker07 Canada +, writes (1 June 2017):

ProofStriker07 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Because I fucked his girlfriend.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (1 June 2017):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntWe all make mistakes, especially when we are young. I am sure this girl does not want reminding of her slightly wild past.

Are you possibly slightly jealous of your mate? You need to get out and concentrate on your own life and leave the past where it belongs.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (1 June 2017):

Honeypie agony auntWhy should you tell him?

So what that you had a 3-some with her in the past. Do you think THIS girl should tell ANY girls you might want to date that SHE had a 3-some with you?

Have some class.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2017):

Don't tell but hope that she has the good sense she can tell him in advance of that incident to avoid any drama in the future.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (1 June 2017):

chigirl agony auntWhy? Just because you have had sex with her doesn't mean you own her or that you get dibs on her for all eternity.

And, maybe you're not used to this happening if you're from a larger city, but people have sex and then move on and have sex with the friends etc, it's nothing new. It happens all the time. Especially in a smaller community, such as a smaller city, or a college town. There are bound to be people you have sex with who previously or in the future will have sex with someone you know. It happens.

The rule of thumb is to not kiss and tell. Show courtesy and discretion. That's the way of a good lover/gentleman. Blurting out who you had sex with and being rude about it will only make you look like an immature little boy. Show some class. Don't kiss and tell.

Don't try to interfere with peoples lives, and remain an outsider looking in, when it comes to all relationships. Getting involved is the recipe for drama. Just smile, be polite, and say nothing.

And believe me, I know what Im talking about. I've been there and done that. Dating one guy, then some time later finding out I have more in common with the best friend, so starting a relationship with the best friend instead. Or had a date with a guy and then he turns out to like my friend and they start to date instead... It happens. It's normal. Just breathe and accept it, and move on. Anything else is creating drama and is, in all seriousness, not worth it. There are more fish in the sea. Besides, you and this girl didn't even date, it was just casual sex. So leave it at that. Casual = not important. Then don't make it into a big deal when it never was.

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