A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am 25 years old and want to go out with a girl who is 18 in June. She likes me a lot, but she says she can't go out with me because I am too old for her; however, her parents are strict about her dating people my age, and I have a theory that the reason is not because I'm too old for her, that she's worried about what her parents will think? Do you think I should tell her that theory or do you think it will ruin a good relatonship(friendly at the moment!) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, penta  +, writes (24 April 2007):
 Why do you assume "her parents' influence" is a bad thing? Some teenage girls do have good relationships with their parents and are more than happy taking what they say about a subject as the final word. Just because it's her parents saying something doesn't automatically make it suspect.
Wait on this one. If you're still interested in a few years try again. But don't push it now; you'll only lose.
A
female
reader, Keria +, writes (20 April 2007):
Irish49 is right, my friend. This girl may not like you, and just might be using her parents as her way out.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2007): No...do not say one word to this girl about her parent's influence, hun. You don't know for certain that is the reason she does not want to date you. You are only believeing what she is telling you. And even if it is, you can't go bombing into her life and changed her mind. based on theory! I know you want to date this girl. She told you why she can't date you..she had said no. There is nothing you can do about this but to respect this girl's wishes and accept this. Change your way of thinking here and face the reality. Stop making up excuses, and denying in your mind, what the honest, truth is. Leave this situation alone and go forward. Move on and find another female who in interested in dating you and wants to have a future with you. Good luck, hun
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut should I tell her that it could be her parents influence?
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A
female
reader, Keria +, writes (20 April 2007):
If a girl says no, it doesn't matter what reason she gives, the answer is no. Sorry, but if you really really like her, and if you strongly suspect that her being too young is the only reason, then just wait a couple of years. If it turns out to be a marriage in the making, her parents will like you more for the next 30 years if you show you are willing to wait for her. If you manipulate it so you can date her now, then you could end up with a lifetime of friction.
But remember too that it could just be an excuse, because she doesn't want to hurt your feelings.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (20 April 2007):
 It might. Girls don't like to get caught out lying after all. Then again maybe she does believe that you're too old for her. I'm sure you remember what it's like to be 18 when anyone older than 20 is SO OLD! Even if she is doing it because of what her parents think that's not necessarily a bad reason either.
CD
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A
male
reader, macboy  +, writes (20 April 2007):
 It truly does sound like her parents influence, but don’t assume it.
It could well be her own choice.
If you can find the balls, go and talk with her parents.
If you can show them that you are mature and suitable for their daughter, you might get in their good books,
Don’t do things behind their back, this can jeopardise your relationship in the future.
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