A
female
age
30-35,
*egrassi
writes:i'm 17 , and i go to an all girls school..so getting over my ex was somewhat kinda easy since i don't see him everyday. he broke up with me about three months ago before christmas vacation...reason being was because he wasn't "in to me as he thought he was." now idk if this meant that he was using me or we kinda just got used of each other and he got bored of me...whatever reason i really don't care anymore ....but truth is after we broke up i never realized how much i loved him and how much i realized that he was my best friend and i enjoyed his company all the way...i just wished he would've wanted to work things out..at first he did then within a day he changed his mind...now this caused so much drama over break between him, his friends and me..and me in addition to false rumors going around at his school saying i had sex with him and gave him herpes....ya...stupid drama that unfortunately i think pushed him more away... he did say he wanted to be close friends if anything....but i haven't talked to him in over a month and idk what this means?...i keep hoping that we will get together but then i always snap myself out of that...right now my number one priority is school..but i miss him and i want him back..i just can't seem to accept that he's really gone and i think he's also moved on too i'm not sure...but now is my question...should i talk to him and send him a text saying hey or just completely forget about him theres only 3 months of school left and i will never see him again including my friends so is it even worth the try trying to make an effort to be friends?...he's tried..he's sent me im on facebook and even came up to me and we had small talk at the end of a rally..but that was about it ..i really haven't made an effort...but what i'm afraid of is that we become friends and then i will want to be with him again...and then one of us which will be me will build feelings for him but then get rejected because i know that he just wants to remain friends.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (4 March 2010):
 Smile and be on your way. You won't seem like a bitch. I've seen ex's and pretended I didn't notice they were even there, lol.
A
female
reader, degrassi +, writes (4 March 2010):
degrassi is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks you guys..for your advice...its true...i'm not gonna be the crying puppy..i will move on...but there's one thing left.....after we broke up i was trying to play it cool then i acted stupid and posting bullentins up on myspace saying how much i wanted things to go back the way they were then another one where i supposedly got drunk to try to get his attn and it did but i made a complete fool out of myself..i went into a deep depression mood...but now i'm over that and things are way better i rebuilt the relationships i had with my friends and family and what not but lets say we do run into each other like at prom..do i ignore him or say hi?...excuse my language but i don't want to seen as a bitch so is it ok if i just smile and go my own way?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2010): Hii have the same problem as u have. I have read the answer to your question which says: don't talk to him. you said u didn't try to get everything ok again, but i did. i have cried for him.i told him how much i loved him and still love.but now i think i've done it wrong. I haven't talk to him for one and a half month. I just can tell u, please forget him and live your own life. If he'll come back, u'll be satisfied and happy about your doing, and if he'll never come back, u didn't lose anything specially your school success. so...,let him do sth for your relationship but not you. i have heard from many experienced people which say: when a MAN really loves a woman, he can never forget her and he'll search for her every where in the world. please be patient and do your daily life like what i'm trying to do. :) take the life easy and be happy.
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A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (3 March 2010):
Do not contact him! You are exactly right in that talking to him again will only make you want to be with him. Then in turn you get false hope every time you hang out, you think "maybe he will change his mind??" and you get let down every time when nothing changes. You love him, you cannot be friends. It is that simple. If you were over him it would be a different story, but it is impossible to be friends with someone you love. Most people only try doing it hoping it will get the other one back. Once they realize it doesn't work that way, sometimes it takes multiple let downs, they move on. But don't hurt yourself unnecessarily. You are doing well not talking to him. Yes you miss him, but him being there and not wanting you the same way is much worse, trust me! I have been on both sides of this situation. Plus an added bonus of being his friend, you would get to hear about any girl he is into or dating. It's one thing to worry he might be dating someone than to hear about her straight from him, how much he likes her, etc... Just stick it out for a couple more months. It is hard but you will move on in time. Time heals all wounds. All cliche, but all very very true. I wish you the best of luck.
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