A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 20 years old. My girlfriend and I have been dating for a little over a year. About a month after we first started going out I was very drunk and cheated on her. I let her know and we talked it over and got over it. We got along really well after that. I got her a promise ring after about 9 months. I can't explain how much I love her and I couldn't imagine being without her. Twice in the last couple months ive caught her msging 2 other guys and saying things like "oooh ya wanna go out? i deffinately would if i was single!" n the guys were calling her cute and stuff. There also older (25ish). The second time I knew that she messaged the guy I asked her about it and she promised me she didn't and even swore over my head. We seem to have gotten over this now but she says now she feels empty. She said she can't imagine losing me and really loves me as much as always but she says she doesnt care if I cheat on her or anything anymore. This is a HUGE change because she used to be extremely jealous. She went from one extreme to the other. I'm not comfortable with her not caring at all because it seems like she wants to be over. Should I stick with her and try to work this out? Could she actually just not care anymore or is she just not in love with me anymore? Should I be worried?
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2010): Let's be honest....drinking is not an excuse to cheat. You cheated because, you wanted to and you felt bad afterwards. Obviously she didn't get "over it" as you claimed because, she doesn't seem to care about the relationship anymore. See, when a person has never been cheated on or had their heart broken before, it's easy for them to assume that someone should just get over it, move on, or just go forward with the relationship. Cheating does alot of damange. Can you imagine what would happen to a student who was caught cheating on the bar exam? He probably we never, ever be able to become a lawyer. So when people think that cheating is just fly by night thing that should be quickly gotten over, they are sadly mistaken. Your girlfriend should be upfront...if she never got over the cheating and feel as though she can never trust you again, instead of her cheating and flirting, she should just walk away from the relationship and so should you.
A
female
reader, heartless420_1  +, writes (6 December 2008):
 Sorry but yes you should be worried, her not caring if you cheat on her. Well it seems to me she okay with it now because she is doing it to you.
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