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Should I send my crush a Valentine’s card?

Tagged as: Crushes, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 February 2019) 8 Answers - (Newest, 25 February 2019)
A female Hong Kong age 13-15, *eloxiide writes:

hey everyone,

i consider myself a shy-ish person and so talking about any of my crushes is a bit difficult for me. no one has ever known who i've liked or do like. i am trying to open up.

anyways, there's someone i like currently, let's call him "j." we're both in the same english class.

we've never talked. we don't sit together. i only started liking him when he asked me a question...:///

i find it difficult to approach him because he has the most intimidating stare. and i get panic attacks!!

valentine's day is coming up, and our school has a charity project led by students to send v-day cards around, which can be anonymously sent...

should i send j one, and what should i say??

should i put my number on it for j to find out who sent the card??

this is my first time experiencing with anything like this, so would i seem creepy if i do send a card but we're not familiar with each other???

View related questions: crush, shy

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (25 February 2019):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntFingers crossed that you can get to know each other and develop a crush on more than just his looks :P Good luck, OP! What you did was brave, so take things slowly and enjoy the texts :)

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A female reader, celoxiide Hong Kong +, writes (24 February 2019):

celoxiide is verified as being by the original poster of the question

celoxiide agony auntHello, just thought I could update everyone.

He texted me on the day, and we've been texting ever since. He said he appreciates it and it surprised him. (Haha) The thing is that he never reallyyyy looks at his phone, but he at least he still makes the effort to text me??? Also, I've realised he's been staring at me a lot in English..

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A female reader, celoxiide Hong Kong +, writes (10 February 2019):

celoxiide is verified as being by the original poster of the question

celoxiide agony auntHello everyone, thank you so much for all the swift responses!

I really appreciate your help and efforts. Because I've got mostly positive feedback, guess what? I've sent it! Oh my lord. I'll update on Valentine's day...And if he sends me a message!

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A male reader, WiseOwlE United States + , writes (8 February 2019):

If it's sent anonymously, send one to anyone you like. I would be careful about giving out your number; because sometimes boys can be a little mischievous. He might tell or give it to others without your permission; when you say you don't like others to know who you like. So be careful.

You wouldn't be creepy when the whole school is sending v-day cards and some can be sent anonymously.

Don't crush too much; if he doesn't seem to pay you any attention at all. You're in the same class, he should notice you. If you find his stares intimidating, practice not being so shy.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom +, writes (7 February 2019):

kenny agony auntI would just take the bull by the horns and send J a valentines card, go for it, what have you got to lose.

Your school is already doing a project led by students to send valentines cards around so its not like you will be the only one doing it.

Its up to you if you wanted to remain anonymous, or put your number on it. The most important thing is just be light hearted about it all and have fun with it, and enjoy the anticipation of having sent it and waiting for the outcome.

Good luck.

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A female reader, Sweet Dreamer xxx United Kingdom +, writes (7 February 2019):

Sweet Dreamer xxx agony auntHiya,

I personally think you should, ask yourself what could go wrong?

Guys can give off the impression of being intimidating and having feelings for them can mix the imitation up with nervousness. Do you suffer with panic attacks often? If so you may need to see someone to help you overcome and fears or anxieties you have.

Regards the writing in the card, this is entirely on how you feel, being at school can be scary when it comes to personal feelings being spread around so I get that you are scared. However I would send it anonymously, with your number, that way you can start talking, he doesn't need to know who you are at first. But I say go for it.

Hope I helped and good luck!

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A female reader, WhatsUpDoc Ireland +, writes (7 February 2019):

WhatsUpDoc agony auntI really feel for you because i suffered from shyness and anxiety in school and the thoughts of telling a boy i liked how i felt would make me feel so sick in my stomach.

Valentines is a big occasion when you are a teenager it can be really exciting or really devastating..My advice if you usually don't put yourself out there to be vulnerable,maybe take a different approach.You said he has already approached you to ask a question about class so maybe you could do the same and start up a friendship that way you get to know him a bit more and see how things develop.If you send an anonymous valentine card its pointless cause he wont have a clue who it is from and on the other hand if you send him a card with all your info on it and you get rejected you will hate sitting in English class for the rest of the school year..The fact he has already approached you makes it easier for you to approach him.Have faith in yourself and best of luck..

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (7 February 2019):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntAww, bless you. This is all very sweet, but Valentine’s Cards are creepy if the person doesn’t like you back and you barely know them. Your crush is only based on his looks, not who he is or a connection you have with him.

Let Valentine’s Day pass, then strike up a conversation with him. If you come on too strong, when you don’t actually talk to each other, you will likely be embarrassed.

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