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Should I initiate and make a call? Or hope for the best?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 June 2015) 2 Answers - (Newest, 20 June 2015)
A female United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

I have an acquaintance that about 6-8 weeks ago told me that he had someone he would like me to meet and that he would set up a night out (drinks and appetizers kind of night) for a few couples to get together so we could meet. I agreed to this. Several weeks went by with no mention of the "night out" so I figured that the man wasn't interested or had met someone or something else.

A few weeks ago this acquaintance contacts me again and says that he was recently reminded that he was going to arrange for this night out and that he hadn't forgotten and that he would still arrange it. At this point, I'm thinking it all seems kind of flaky and I'm not counting on anything, so I just said "Great! Let me know!" and left it at that.

A few days ago, I hear from the acquaintance again. He tells me that he's busy with some family stuff and that as soon as he's available to go out, he will set up this outing. Now, I'm not sure why all these other people have to go for me and this gentleman to meet, but I don't' know this acquaintance well, and now so much time has gone by that I'm a little annoyed and it seems a little strange, but I'm also wondering if the acquaintance is a control freak and wants to be there for the meeting in case the meeting turns into something more so that he can "take credit" for introducing us.

The very next day, acquaintance texts me the guys phone number and says "you should call him or text him sometime!" and asks if I mind passing my number along to him to which I respond that it's fine.

So strange after all these weeks of insisting that we have to go on this group date. But anyway… I have no way of knowing if acquaintance guy actually passed my number along.

I would really like to meet this guy. I know another couple that know him and they really like THEM a lot. I trust their opinion quite a bit and/but I feel as though they would like to stay out of these shenanigans that have gone on with acquaintance guy. Traditionally I would like the guy to call me or text me first to get together. But this has anything but a normal "fix-up" so far.

Should I just hope my number was given and wait it out some more? Or should I just send a simple text that says, Hi…It's so-and-so.

Acquaintance guy gave me your number. Give me a call sometime if you'd like to get together for coffee or a drink!

I know that there's the school of thought that says let the man do the pursuing. And I REALLY like that.

But…is it pursuing to give him my number and sit back and let him do the rest if he so chooses? Any advice

would be GREATLY appreciated!

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A female reader, boo22 United Kingdom +, writes (20 June 2015):

boo22 agony auntI agree with honeypie.Sometimes you have to play the long game. Have a bit of patience and faith. If he's not in the right place for whatever reason there's no point in forcing it. Good luck x

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (20 June 2015):

Honeypie agony auntHmm, not sure if it was the "Acquaintance " who was stalling or the guy he has tried to set you up with. (maybe HE didn't want to be set up...)

So while my curiosity would be peeked... I'd say the ball is in his court - IF the "Acquaintance" gave him your number.

I'm in your age group (46) so yes, I'm old fashioned and would expect a guy (specially one I don't know) to pursue me IF he was interested. Now if I had met him before, I might call.

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