A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Married for 7 years with a 5 years old kid,My problem is my husband shares everything with his family. I dont have any privacy at home . I I am a private person and he knows it. We have talked many times regarding this issue, last night I found out that he has shared something with his sister which is embarrassing and soon I will be hearing it from all the relatives and family! I do not trust him and I am leaving in fear. I am trying to move out and get divorce as I am done with all of it . He is not an independent person and I hate it. I have done all my best to either move from here to be less involve so we work on this problem but he is not going to move or chang. Being involve in a family business has made this problem even worse . I am so angry at this point and he just can not justify his recent action.I have already rented an apartment to leave and he is begging me and crying to change my mind. What should I do ?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2014): Cattycakes I am still laughing at "His sister is in your underwear, which is way too close!" Thank you so much everyone for your advise.
A
female
reader, cattycakes  +, writes (10 May 2014):
I know how you feel. My marriage is a bit like that too and it drives me mad. Marriages have parts to them that are private. Confidentiality is a part of trust. Some things must remain personal and it is really important to put a husband or wife first when deciding what information to share. It is frustrating for you that he seems to not have listened in the slightest. It is careless and disrespectful. It is as though he does not "get it" even vaguely. His sister is in your underwear, which is way too close!
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A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (10 May 2014):
Well, sometimes a third party can facilitate change that two people can't. So maybe you should separate for the time being then see a marriage counselor. Marriage can be difficult and sometimes divorce is inevitable, but it's worth doing whatever you can to stick together and be happy.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2014): I am the OP-I have already demanded for moving.He just denies any wrong doing and his point is if I have a problem they are all there for me and us.I prefer to have my privacy and do not reach out to get help from them. It is so frustrating that they make plans for my life behind my back. They have an influence on him.At the beginning of our marriage I was so surprised that how many times a sister or brother should call you in a day, maybe more than 10 times!. I have no problem with close relationship between families but it is overwhelming, his mother still has the key to my house! I demanded that enough is enough and he got the keys but I am sure she has some copies.He is not a bad person he is an excellent father but I can not take it any more. I will move to see how he is going to fix it! Thanks for your responses
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2014): Go through with your divorce. If you're as angry as you are, and he doesn't respect your wishes; there seems to be no room for compromise. If you stay, he'll just continue what he's doing; because he feels you can't do anything about it if he doesn't stop.
Anytime a husband deliberately ignores his wife; when she has come to him to discuss a recurring problem in their marriage, he doesn't really care. You are entitled to your privacy, and he should respect you enough to listen to your concerns.
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