A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been close friends with a girl from University since I began there last September. She isn't sexy, but she's not unattractive either. She has always been a very quiet girl who seemed very normal and average in her personality. I have never been that attracted to her but recently, at a university party, I took her back to mine and we had sex. We had never thought about each other in that way before, but after that first drunken night, we realised we had real attraction to each other and we have since had many more sexual encounters. She has made it clear that, due to her longing to follow a career, she wants this arrangement to stay as a casual, friends with benefits situation. I am fine with this. But I am worried that this will affect our friendship as we are still mates when not in the bedroom. I don't want this to stop because me and her are dynamite together in the bedroom but I also dont want to lose a friend. Should I just go back to being her friend or should I just embrace the opportunity of no strings sex and go with the flow?
View related questions:
drunk, friend with benefits, university Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (17 June 2011):
 FWB never works.
every single guy I slept with without a "relationship" is gone from my life now...
the current FWB is no longer an FWB but is a man I am going to probably marry eventually... we were SUPPOSED to be FWB/NSA... that didn't work...
someone always cares.
oh and my BF thinks I'm beautiful and sexy now...but when we started I was not his type and not attractive etc... now I'm the most beautiful woman in the world to him....
personally I'd not label your relationship but if you are happy and she is happy just go with the flow but keep it honest...
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (17 June 2011):
 FWB's is never a good idea. Sure its tempting but unfortunately it never works, can end up really hurting one or both people involved, and affects other possible future relationships.
Keep in mind, its very difficult to go back to being "just friends" after being FWB's. If it was that simple, you wouldn't have ended up in bed in the first place.
Decide what you want and be firm about it. Why would you want to be in something that has no future? Just for the heck of it? When you have a serious girlfriend tomorrow and she asks you about your sexual past, how are you going to feel? Would you be able to accept a girl who has done the same thing as you?
Don't act in haste, or you will repent at leisure. Tempting as it is, stop it right now. You have your whole life in front of you to have sex and if you do it with the right person with feelings involved, in a committed relationship, it will be better than anything else.
...............................
|
