A
female
age
36-40,
*sabella1987
writes:Hi dear cupid. I need help again. I broke up with my boyfriend for one week but now we get back together again.(we're long distantance) We broke up, because of his family. And I told him if he stop listen to his family and move on with me (just me and him) then we can live somewhere no family around, both side. So, we pick the Noth side of United State. And he request me one thing. I have to change my religion. I was Muslim and he is Christian. He want me to be christian. He said one day if we have kids he don't want any problem with me again. We use to fight about religion.I don't know what to decide.If I go with him to be Christian my parents will be very upset. May be they won't be talk to me anymore. I don't know what to do. I don't know nothing about Christian.If anyone can give me advice what is my option.Please. Sorry for my english.I hope you understand what I mean :)
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broke up, christian, get back together, move on, muslim Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Share Bear  +, writes (20 October 2009):
 Hmm- well, presuming that he thinks that this is fair for him to ask of you, ask the same of him. You convert to Christianity and he converts to Muslim. Your families will both love your partners, and you can spend hours arguing about how the other one is right.
If it’s fair for him to ask this of you- he'd do the same in return, right??
Also- although I'm not actually religious myself, this is something which i would find a little offensive to any heartfelt belief or religion. Convert because you believe in the religion and their ways; don't ‘believe’ because you already converted. Any religious or moral faith is usually based upon integrity. If you're not even being honest to yourself, haven't you fallen at the first hurdle?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2009): Even though you love him very much, tell him that if he truly loves you, he will not ask you to change your religion. And also, try asking him to change his into yours and see what he says.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2009): Don't throw away your religion and your family's support just for this guy who can't accept you as you are. It's kind of selfish of him to ask you to convert-why won't he read leave Christianity and become Muslim for you? If neither of you are very religious then it's one thing, but if you believe strongly in La'illahuillAllah MuhammadurRasoolullah then you shouldn't give up your faith. Make sure he understands what he is asking of you and if you don't feel like you can do it, be honest with him about that. If he still won't accept you as a Muslim then he should go find some other girl at church.If you believe in Allah, then believe that he will send you the right person at the right time. If not, then you have to decide for yourself how you are going to deal with your family, and if it is worth it to possibly lose them.
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A
male
reader, softtouchmale2003 +, writes (19 October 2009):
 Religion is the biggest problem in the world, not just in relationships between men and women.
Faith is an unquestioned belief in a superior power or diety called God or Allah or whatever the name is.
From this point of view, you say you were Muslim. You need not adopt any religion if you choose. Some people go Unitarian.
The point I'm getting at, if you love God, what the form of that love takes by way of religion, is irrelevant. Got is within you always at that point.
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A
female
reader, Emjo +, writes (19 October 2009):
 Hunnie, I'll admit i am quite feminist so this answer could be somewhat biased but i personally dont feel any man is worth changing anything about yourself for... If he loved you then this sort of problem shouldnt get in the way. I realise this is easier said than done but you need to weigh up what is best for you. Are you really ready to give up your belife system for just one man?
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female
reader, Accountable +, writes (19 October 2009):
 Absolutely not.
Faith is all about believing without proof - simply believing with the whole of your soul, something which relies on nobody else, and should be affected by nobody else. I personally am not religious, but I think that to simply change your religion would be to devalue any ideas of religion that exist in society, and for yourself. Maybe you could compromise on some of both of your practices so that the differences between your religions are not so pronounced, but I honestly don't understand how anybody who is truly religious - and has such unconditional faith in the first place - could consider changing their religion for another person.
Good luck, I hope you two can resolve these issues. :)
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (19 October 2009):
If you're having to change for a guy, that's not a great sign to be honest. He should just accept you as you are. That said, you must follow your heart. If you ove this guy, and you want to change, then do that. If you don't want to change, then don't. Think very carefully.
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