A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ever have this feeling, if so what'd you do?met a girl, she's everything i'd ever want...our chemistry is amazing, like we were meant for each other...we make each other happy...but she's 19, no kids, married and is gonna give him another chance...she doesn't know if she still loves him but wants to find out if it's the right thing....we still think about each other everyday and miss each other...she doesn't wanna hurt me by stringing me along and wants to findout for sure if their marriage is not gonna work then nothing will hold her back...i feel like we are perfect for each other and she obviously has feelings for me as well...i feel like i shouldn't give up on this and wanna take a chance at something that might be perfect...then on the back of my mind i feel like i should back off for awhile and let her findout for herself what she really wants...it's like finding that perfect someone with a circumstance...like some crazy drama movie.. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (29 September 2007):
 The reason you are not particularly worried about the success of her marriage is because it suits you better if it fails. Look at everything you wrote. That moral answer is obvious. Leave her alone for now and realize you should have never been involved with a married woman in the first place.
A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (29 September 2007):
 It is a hard situation but I think she is right to give her marriage another go. This doesn't mean you pair can never be together however. I am a firm believer in 'what is meant to be' and she may find her marriage doesn't work out second time around...lets face it, it failed once! I would say step back, let her live her life and find out what she wants and leave the door open for her to step back in sometime in the future. She may come to realise how much you mean to her by stepping back into that marriage.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (28 September 2007):
 The best thing to do is back off. Let her find her way. If you push too hard against her desire to find out, you'll loose her permanently.
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A
female
reader, brooke5426 +, writes (28 September 2007):
 I think she is doing the right thing. She's married - she needs to give everything shes got into trying to make that work, or at the very least she needs to try so she can walk away from the marriage knowing there was nothing more she could do to save it.give her time and space to find out what she wants. you cant make the decision for her no matter how much you want her to choose you. everything happens for a reason so just wait it out and let her have the time to find out how she feels. if she chooses her husband then it just wasnt meant to be for you and her. and if she chooses you at least you will know that her husband is not an issue and she has put to rest any doubt in her mind that she should've kept trying with him so she can focus entirely on building a relationship with you. i will say though that even if she does leave her husband you should take things very very slowly with her. shes only 19 and if she comes out of a relationship as obviously serious as that one was, its unlikely she will want to jump straight into another committed one immediately.good luckbrookex
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