A
male
age
,
*erti1151
writes:Is it wrong for a married man to ask a younger female worker if she is interested(she has just been divorced)?The female in the marriage is Bi-Polar and wont accept her condition.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2008): Well I guess I can add my two cents here. My wife was diagnosed before we were married, but while we were dating. In the 8 years we have been togather and the five we have been married she has had at least one manic episode every spring. With four out of the five that we have been married her leaving the house. Running around cheating, parting, and generally throwing our marriage away. She always has come back and not knowing exactly why she does it. This last time that we are in is the worst she has again moved out. And took out a restraining order and other things, went on a shopping spree to include buying a new truck. She is even telling everyone I want a seperation. That is the farthest from the truth.
So guy if you want your marriage to be over be honerable be stand up and tell her you want out and do it when she is not MANIC!!!! and then get out and cut all ties and leave with honor. Bringing in another player only makes it all worse and at least one person will get hurt and it may be the innocent woman you want to bring in.
A
female
reader, stina +, writes (5 October 2007):
 Hi berti1151,If you two have an open marriage, then there is nothing wrong with that. But if you don't, then it would be considered cheating.What do you mean that your wife is not accepting that she's bipolar? Has she been to the doctor, or have you diagnosed her with this?Just a hunch, but maybe she's "bi-polar" because she senses you want to cheat on her. But if she's been this way for a long time, then you may need to seriously have a talk with her. Don't "accuse" her of being bi-polar, but really talk with her and let her know that you are concerned and want to help. Perhaps suggest counseling, but try to let her know in a gentle way. You know your wife better than anyone, so it should probably be up to you on how you should handle this discussion.The thing is, though, that you should try to fix your marriage before you move on. And if you want to move on, you need to divorce. Without doing so is very disrespectful - not only to your wife, but to the next person you would be seeing. Do you think the woman you're interested in *wants* to see a married man? Of course, she may like you - but don't you think she'd feel more comfortable if you were unattached? (If you don't know, read through all of the "I'm seeing a married man" questions on this site. It may help you to understand what your possible future partner may think. And you should definitly read "My husband is cheating on me!" questions, as well.)Take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2007): Hi Berti
The big question here is if your wife has been properly diagnosed, or if it's just a hunch of yours. If it's a hunch you may well be right, but it would be best for her to get some professional advice which I appreciate might take a lot of persuasion.
If you feel strongly enough about it you could perhaps let your wife know that divorce could be on the cards if she doesn't agree to that, as she is probably dragging you down with her.
Then there's this other woman - not a good idea I'm afraid. If she's just got divorced, another man in her life is probably the last thing on her mind. Remember you married for better or worse, and unfortunately you're at the worse end of the scale at the moment, but things can only improve if you work at it.
Phil
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2007): What?? The female in who's marriage is bipolar?? Your wife?? Anyways, yes it is wrong for a married man to ask another girl out. And you can't just assume that your wife is bipolar. She would need to be tested for that condition. And if she really is bipolar and you just can't deal with her then you should think about getting divorced before you start engaging or even thinking about an affair.
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH  +, writes (5 October 2007):
 I am sure you already know its not dont you?.
Your Married and your wife is suffering from Bi-Polar (depresion). So you turniing your back on her, and getting to-gether with another girl could tip her over the edge.
If you really believe that she has this condition and you are not happy to continue in your marriage, at least try to end things with your wife as easy as possible for her, without setting up a new one already.
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