A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So i was making out with a girl in a cluband i was llike really hard that time but then we wanted to take it further..so we went to the beach and we tried to have sex over there ..i got reaaly hard..and i went inside herbut it was winter and we were next to the beach with no clothes..i was inside her but while we were having sexin my mind i was sayingis that what sex supposed to be?coz i thought sex would be great but it turned for me to prefer masturbationanyway while i was inside her i started getting soft(it was cold) and then i couldnt go back insidenow after 2 months past am still worried abotu it coz now even when i watch porn i dont get as hard as i used tolike when i have an erection i can bend itam sometimes thinking that i wont be able to penetrate with that hardnesssometimes tho even when am not as hard i am sure i can penetratewhats wrongyes i get hard at the mornings sometimes in classe too but am still not as hardand i got the wrong idea about what sex is..i regret it and i can tell u i didnt like it at all..and i know that this is just a bad experience but it hurts my egoand i am 16..pls help me it really bothers me i kinda know its all in my mind but i cant get it off my mind what do i do
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male
reader, MyDestiny  +, writes (6 February 2009):
 well the problem with you not liking the sex you were having on beach was probly sour surroundings..you were by the cold beach naked in the winter..and the problem could be that yu really no nothing about this girl..see when you really know someone and love them it makes sex even better...
i understand you man, your only 2 years older than me..
i suggest you just mmake some new female friends and hopely like one and hopefully become your grlfriend..and then you'l have a string bond
then if you decide to have sex, you'll find it much more worthwhile
gudd luck
A
male
reader, ArmyMedic  +, writes (2 February 2009):
 It's stage fright! And a cold beach when you are drunk is the worst place to have sex, well maybe not the worst but certainly not great!
Stop making a big deal out of it, once you find a girl and relax around her girls like the whole romantic and being in the mood thing. and this can help you too, relaxed in a nice romantic environment with LOTs of foreplay, make her feel great before trying to just shove it in! Make the whole thing about her and then when you are both ready and so far into the moment you forget about your worries and enjoy!
Remember to always wear a condom!
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A
female
reader, supermum +, writes (2 February 2009):
 The problem with sex is, unless you feel an attraction or atleast severe lust towards the other party, that its not always as good as you expect it to be. I wouldnt worry that this experience wasnt as you hoped it mite be... i presume this waas your first time? in which case, you were probably too focused on what you were doing to really enjoy the sensations you were feeling, plus the cold never helps! Try to focus on what feels good for you, not on whether you are really hard or not. If it doesnt feel good, stop. If it does have fun! Also, it is an idea not always to masturbate to porn... sometimes your mind can work up wonderful fantasys... if you always masturbate to porn, you mite find that you cant maintain an erection when faced with the real thing unless you have porn on in the background.... which wont always go down well with the girls!!!!! Good luck!
BTW ... always make sure (as i am sure you know) that you use protection.... there is nothing like an STI to dent your confidence!
all the best
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