A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Okay. I'll try to not make this too long. I have this ex boyfriend/friend who recently came back into my life a couple months ago. We have known each other for a very long time,(since we were 12 and 13, we're 28 and 29 now) and we dated when we were teens. We were always convinced back then that we were soulmates, but things never worked out. When we broke up, he told me, "They say if you love something let it go. If it comes back, it's yours." Anyway, we remained friends for a while, but ultimately lost touch until recently. I look back and can remember how hard it was on me to lose him. I don't know if anyone here truly knows what it feels like to be in love with someone, but if you do then you know that one of the worst things in the world is to lose that love. It took me years to get over him. It scarred me. But okay, fast forward to now. So we recently started talking and met up and it's been amazing to see him after all these years for the 1st time again, and he said the same thing. We talk on the phone everyday now, at least once a day. We see each other at least once a week, (i'm trying to do this slow) and its been great getting to know him again. So, he told me he was falling in love with me again, and reminded me of what he had said when we were younger abt loving something and letting it go. He also said he was gonna marry me. I'm already on the ground for him. (I'm wholeheartedly convinced he's my one true love.) But he is the one who also made me a skeptic, so I am definitely skeptical too. To let you all know how I feel about him, words can't even start to explain. I would do anything for him. It's fireworks times a bagillion. But here's the thing, and this is probably so stupid, but I'm scared of losing him twice, scared of having my heart ripped out again, etc. Earlier this week, while casually checking out his facebook page, I noticed a girl (she's pretty) had posted on his wall something like: "I'm so happy we met today!!!!!!!" (and then she liked her own post) And it's really bothering me. I've seen posts from other girls on his stuff, and its really not a big deal. But for some reason this one is just driving me crazy. Why is she so happy? Where did they meet? OMG does he like her too? What should I do????? I'm seriously tempted to just never take a call from him again, because that would hurt less at this point than going deeper into emotions and having to go through such a heartbreak again. I just need advice. And to put it on the record, I'm not usually crazy like this in relationships. It is something about this one guy that just does it to me. It's love? Help. :(
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male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (3 November 2011):
 Well first I believe you're definitely in love- and head over heels for this guy. And if you add in the amount of time that you two not only dated, but knew each other, it's perfectly understandable for you to think he's your soulmate.
But I would definitely take things slow with him- and just work on rebuilding your relationship with him. And I agree with the previous commenter response- and you should definitely ask him about the girl on his Facebook page.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2011): ok so if you are so bound to be together and love each other so very much, soul mates as you stated, then for goodness sake just ask him about the girl. Just keep in mind that he is not yours yet. Point blank ask him exactly what you wrote. Why is she so happy, where did they meet, etc. If he loves you as much as you love him, she's toast anyway.
After he clears the air for you I say go for it! Would you rather deprive yourself of love and what if's by not reuniting? There is a saying but I will screw it up "It is better to love and be loved than to never have loved at all" something like that anyway. Life is too short to deprive yourself of true happiness. What if this guy truly is your soulmate and because you were scared of losing him a second time, you didn't pursue it? Look what you will be missing out on. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. It may not have been the right timing for you both the first time around. You have matured and grown since and maybe now you are ready for the commitment. Go for it! Good luck.
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