A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I am a teenage male and a virgin, let's just say 15-18 and I am stuck on the time old question of does size matter. I won't lie, I'm at a 4.5 to 5 inches and for someone like me, you see guys with 6 and 7 inch penises wondering if THEY are big enough and you look at yourself and wonder.........where does that put me? Honestly I have never really stopped to contemplate if I'm big enough and I don't dwell on it but recently it has started to seep into my mind and I feel guilty for letting a thought like this get me down. I have been told there are different circumstances to this, yes size does matter when it comes down to pleasuring a woman, each with her personal preference, but usually larger tends to be better because even if you have unused length, you can at least satisfy her with as much as she wants. However if she loves you, then the fact that you can't pleasure her won't really matter because of the fact that she loves you and will accept you for who you are. But come on guys, just because she doesn't mind doesn't mean you don't feel insufficient, am I right? To me, to think that I couldn't be good enough for the woman I love would crush me, whether or not she minds. For all the girls who only get with guys in order to have sex with them and thus in that equation penis size is all that really matters, well I wouldn't, at this point in time, consider a girl like that and so it doesn't matter so much at this point in time, but it is something to consider. I know that things happen as they may and I'm not impatient to have sex, but please just help me put my mind at ease. I know this isn't really a question, I am just trying to state somethings on my mind and I humbly ask for the various opinions of the agony aunts on dearcupid. Thank you for reading this.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks everyone, this really helped and im sorry, this shouldnt be bothering me but thanks for the advice
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): I agree very much with 'sandman' and his views on how women are aroused by not just your penis but you and your mannerisms as a whole. In terms of pure sexual intercourse, take this advice straight from a girl
All girls are different, not just in terms of their desires but also just physically. For me, and I'm sure many other girls, a larger penis can be quite uncomfortable if not just painful. After sleeping with a guy with a smaller penis, i found I was more comfortable and able to be aroused rather than constantly worrying about being uncomfortable
having said that, there is not a huge difference really. It doesnt' matter if a guy is too big or too small, there are DIFFERENT things to enjoy from both. Don't let popular culture convince you that one is actually better than the other.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): As a woman, I would implore to really believe that penis size DOES NOT MATTER! As the previous answers say, there is far more to a relationship than penis size, which in the big scheme of things is of very little importance. My ex had a larger penis than my present boyfriend, but my present boyfriend is an abolutely amazing guy and we're getting engaged soon. From my experience, when women are making decisions about men, penis size is not really on the radar. There are many ways in which you can pleasure a woman other than penetrativ sex. Would you pick a girlfriend, or be sexually unsatisfied, based solely on the size of her breasts? Of course not. And I think women are the same. Don't stress about it. Women will be attracted to you because of who you are and how you act, and penis size is more or less irrelevant to this.
By the way, I would think that 4.5-5 inches is more than enough to pleasure a woman, so don't stress about that for another second.
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A
male
reader, Sandman +, writes (18 November 2008):
 Hmm, you point out the very thing that many men have difficulty with. Wondering if they'll ever be "good enough" for the woman they are with. Yes, there are women (and men) out there who would prefer a larger penis to a smaller one. To them, there is something additionally sexually arousing about being penetrated with a large penis.
But remember this, sex does begin in your pants! It begins in the mind. The reason most women will say that size doesn't matter is because once you begin to love someone - REALLY love someone, the good things outweigh the bad (not that a 5 inch penis is 'bad' - i'm just making a point). Sex begins with her thinking about you - watching you interact with others or how aggressive you are in your career. How you open doors for her, pour her drinks, hold her hand, caress her hair/face, etc. How passionate you are about things you care about. How passionate (not sexually) you are with her. When she thinks about these things, she begins to get emotionally aroused and ready. By the time you physically penetrate her, she remembers all the things she previously thought about and now you are inside her - you are hers. Stroking her, caressing her, kissing her, holding her, making love to her. But she isn't thinking about your penis - she's thinking about YOU. The whole YOU. And when she does, she WILL be pleased/pleasured. She may not have an orgasm all the time but this is probably why women will say they don't necessarily have to have an orgasm every time in order to be pleased. Because they love being with the man they LOVE, that's what really matters. It doesn't matter what his penis size really, she can still feel it and if she's in the right mind set about it, she will get pleasure from whatever you've got.
So don't worry about what you don't have. Focus on what you DO have. The things you have going for you. Find your successes and amplify them. View yourself as a wanted man - all the women want you. Not because of what's in your pants, but because of what you can offer. Hey, the guy with the 8,9, or 10" cock is probably the biggest idiot in the world and trust me, after a while of being with that idiot, she will fall head over heels for you! Why? Because it wasn't the size of penis that attracted her in the beginning. But now that she's found out how much of a jerk off he is, she'd rather be with someone who really loves her - huge penis or not.
Hope this helps.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2008): At 4.5" to 5" you're in the 'average' ball park mate. I don't know yet of any young guy who didn't want more in the way of cock size, myself included and I'm average and these days very satisfied with what I've got.
Your future lady(s) won't be judging wether or not your worth it by the size of your cock. Personality is all, trust!
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