A
female
age
51-59,
*AURIE 2017
writes:Hello, I am 46 years old. I met a man from the US online and over two years we have been talking on the phone and communicating via email. We got along very well and he told me he would visit in January of the second year of our meeting. When the time for his visit came and passed without him coming, I asked him about it and he said he had been denied a visa because his country's government thought he would become radicalized. My country is not on the US ban list so this didn't make sense to me but I gave him the benefit of a doubt. He once again told me that he would come at the end of the second year in our relationship but when the time drew near, he told me that our meeting should be a personal plan and that I should work as though we had no plans. At the same time, he began discussing setting up an online business in my country that he would run from his country. He wanted me to go out and get information about possible investors for the business, but he wouldn't give me a website or anything to which I would refer. When I asked about this, he lost his temper and accused me of wanting to do things my way.In all the years we have been talking, he calls on a private line. One time, he accidentally called on his line but the call was dropped. I called back and the call went to voice mail. The name on voice mail was different from that he had given me. I let this pass. However, one time he sent me a picture of himself with his daughter. I posted this on my integral account and somehow his daughter saw it and send me a rude message about whom she thought I was and why I was posting her picture online. When I checked her profile, I found information about my online friend. I found out that he is 14 years older than he let on and that his name is different from the one he gave me. I found out that he had also lied about his work and where he lives. His daughter reported that I had their picture on my integral account and he called me and was very angry, demanding to know my motive for posting their picture. I tried to explain that I thought it was ok to have their picture in my account because he sent it himself. He demanded that I delete my account. I haven't asked him about all that I found out about his identity. I can't help thinking he had an ulterior motive for our relationship but I just can't understand why he-a 75 year old man, would then string me along. I would never have judged him on the basis of his relationship. I know I should quit this relationship. I would just appreciate a second opinion on all this. Thank you. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (1 December 2017):
 I don't have a clue what his motive would be, just like I am not sure how you could say you are in a two year relationship with him when you have never even met him, don't know his real name or anything about him. Honestly don't waste your time. The internet is full of liars and scammers.
A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (22 November 2017):
 What are you getting out of this?
He sounds like a compulsive liar that's using you as an escape from his day to day life. My question, what would ever come of this?
Stop wasting your time, find a relationship closer to home.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (22 November 2017):
 Run a mile from this. It stinks to high heaven. Don't even worry what the motives are. You don't need any of his or his daughters complications in your life.
Cut the ties immediately. There is nothing good in it for you.
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