A
male
age
22-25,
* year old
writes:I am an 8 year old boy from Cupar in Fife in Scotland. My mum and dad have been not really been getting on well and they have had some bad arguments. One day my mum got very annoyed with my big brother for putting a towel in with the dirty clothes. Then she grabbed my sister and shook her and shouted because she did not put away ironing properly and it got wringled. She shouted at me when i used gel in my hair like my big brother and said that i looked like a chav. She burst into tears at some point during this morning and said that she hated us all. I was very upset and sat alone downstairs crying. We had to go to mum's hairdressers appointment and on the way out she asked why i was crying and i said because she said that she hated me. She just ignored me and asked if i had brought a fleece. I know that my mum's mum would never say that because she is so loving but i am really upset and do not know what to do can i have some help please. Thankyou Reply to this Question
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female
reader, charlie-rosexxx +, writes (29 October 2008):
I know you are upset please dont cry, my mum and dad used to have arguments all of the time but we all worked it out it does not go on for long and maybe if you tell your other reletives you will have some more support ttry not to be upset you can get through this xxx hugs
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 I'll bet that your Mum's Mum said that to your Mum when she was a little girl at some point, Hun... Your Gran loves you, but she doesn't have the responsibility to look out for you and your siblings 24/7, so it's a different kind of love! Your Mum was just having a really bad day and it sounds like she and your Dad are having a rough time of it right now. I know this is all pretty scary for you, but you should know that Mom's aren't perfect and they blow up sometimes. I'll bet she regrets saying that she hates you, I bet it even scared HER the moment that it came out of her own mouth. She's your Mom, but she's just human. Humans make mistakes. I'm a Mom too, and it happened to me as well, and I can assure you, your Mum loves you more than anything in the world. It's really hard to be a Mom sometimes, because you feel that your job is to run everything and keep everyone else happy, even when you are unhappy. You didn't say how old your siblings are. Perhaps you could talk with them and agree to be extra good with the chores right now? Maybe, if you are old enough, you could all cook dinner for Mum and Dad as a surprise. Ask your Gran to help and maybe babysit you all for a weekend. You know, our family went through this a few times, and we are still together, so try not to worry yourself too much. Families have fights and bad times on occasion. It will get better. Like the other people said, talk with your siblings or your Gran if you are worried. You Mum loves you and your siblings, don't worry about that! Hugs, Sweetie!
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A
female
reader, BaybiiLolly +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Sweetheart, don't worry. I'm sure your Mum and Dad will sort things out! Your mum is just probably a little bit stressed at the moment, and I am sure she didn't mean what she said!
Maybe you should try talking to her ?
Sit down with her and tell her how you are feeling. Tell her you don't like all the arguments and it makes you upset? If that doesn't work, then maybe you coukd tell another family member..a Gran or an Auntie or somebody like that.
Whatever your Mum and Dad decide to do, it will be for the best, trust me.
I hope it all works out.
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A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 hi hun im so sorry for your situation. but you have to know that your mum does love you - she's just upset at the moment and is saying things that she doesn't mean. have you talked to your granny? maybe she could help you or talk to your mum? i dont think that you should take wat your mum says to heart because she doesnt mean it and she really does love you. try and be there for her now too because she is obviously very stressed.
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Im sorry that she said that to you and sorry for your situation but sometimes people say stupid things in the heat of the moment and they dont really mean it, sounds to me that your mum is very stressed at the moment and taking it out on her kids, i would talk to someone you are close to in your family and they should be able to help you out and soothe the situation.
Dont take it to heart your mum loves you
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): Hello,
I am sorry you are in this situation. but you can make it better. Times are hard at the moment, and it sounds like your mum is very stressed. she should'nt take it outon you, and is proberly feeling guilty. which will be adding to all the reasons she is shouting and crying all the time. Could you talk to anyone in your family? an older sibling or your nan. someone like that? tell them about your mum and ask them to help.
Or you could tell your mum you love her, and hate seeing her so upset all the time, ask her what you could do to make her life easier, by telling her you love her and talking the her could make her realise how unhappy she is making you, she proberly doesn't realise the impact on you it has. good luck, im thinking of you. x
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (16 July 2008):
 oh sweetheart im sorry youre having to go through all of this..im pretty sure your mum loves you with all of her heart..just she is going through a hard time right now. and shes taking it out on your brother and sister when they do wrong kind of like the nearest punch bag so to speak..wish i could give you a big hug..try and speak to your brother about this im sure he will understand and tell him how your feeling and that you need someone to talk to..im sure he will understand..hope that helps. dont worry it will be fine your mum just needs to sort things out.. hope that helps BIG HUGS aphex x
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A
female
reader, BendychickP  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Oh honey, I'm sorry your parents are going through a tough time. But things like this happen, and you need to know that this is not anyones fault. While what your Mum did was not right, she is probably very stressed and upset at the moment. You need to talk to her about the thing that happened and explain how it made you feel. If your Mum makes you feel unsafe or unhappy, you should tell an adult about it. You mentioned your Grandma? Well maybe she could help. Remember that no one can make you feel sad or helpless. I hope I helped and I hope that your home situation gets better. Best wishes.
Bendy xx
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