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My married boss wants sex...I love my job and don't want to leave. What should I do?

Tagged as: Cheating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 May 2006) 5 Answers - (Newest, 27 May 2006)
A female , anonymous writes:

At the xmas party, i slept with boss, it has taken me a while to get over my own embarrassment and get on with my job and we both agreed to put this behind us.

However we still exchange certain looks and yesterday he asked me if I fancied doing some overtime. I said no because id made arrangements. However i know its just going to be "sex". He's married. Part of me wants to do this and part of me doesnt. What do i do. I love my job and i dont want to leave.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2006):

Hmm... it can be hard. Do you have any feelings for him beyond sex? Did the relationship evolve from a friendship?

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A male reader, eddie Canada +, writes (21 May 2006):

eddie agony auntYou already no the answer to this. NO MORE SEX !! It's like you're the candy store and it's...... buy one get one free day !! He's married ! You'll see some day that attractions are what get us into a relationship but moral fibre and love are the things that keep us together. He can offer you sex but he can't offer you his heart. That should be for his wife. You should demand more from your partners. It should actually be insulting to you that he thinks you wold be content to settle whatever he has left over after he puts an honest day into his real life at home.

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A female reader, tequilarodeo +, writes (21 May 2006):

tequilarodeo agony auntMy opinion, don't do it!... he's married, he's chosen his path in life, it was a one time thing and by what you have said it has taken you time to get over it. So why do it again? Why make it bigger than it already is? Once could be forgotten with time, but if it happens again he could come to expect it. He's using you... it's very clear to see. There are consequences to almost all actions in life, it happens and even though it may be hard now, it will be better in the long run.

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A female reader, bonym United Kingdom +, writes (20 May 2006):

bonym agony auntListen to me my friend, this is not a good idea at all. First of all her is MARRIED and secondly he is your boss. Why on earth do you want to jeopardise your job like this? I mean if you decide not to have sex with him he may turn nasty and start causing problems, on the other hand if you do have sex with him or continue your affair with him it will make you a cheat and thats not a nice label to have. Cant you see that he is simply using you for a bit of action? Where is your self respect and dignity and pride. Why would you want to have sex with a married man at especially your boss? Its a bad idea, I have seem what sort of thing happens when these affairs go terribly wrong. xXx

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A female reader, shania United Kingdom +, writes (20 May 2006):

shania agony auntYou have made it clear that you dont want to continue this situation but if you keep exchanging looks then eventually your boss is going to think that you want to start it up again...but you are right,it will be only for sex...he will do whatever he has got to do with you...then rush home to his wife and sleep with her.Do you want to be used? I think you deserve better then that...i pity his poor wife.If you want to keep your job then you are entitled to carry on working there but if your boss starts to hassle you then you would have to tell him straight that you are not interested.Are you strong enough to do this? If i was you,i would ignore his intentions and if he starts to threaten you with the sack then you could take him to a tribunal.

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