A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:While we are having sex, my husband wants me to help him imagine that he is fucking a really hot whore. I try to do it at times, but it becomes very difficult to digest it and live with it. As a result i am very disturbed about it. Please advise. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Oldybutgoody  +, writes (22 September 2008):
Making love is not always the same. Sometimes it is gently restrained, sometimes more physically passionate, and I would not believe any woman who said she didn't fantasise about her favourite singer/filmstar being the man having sex with her, on occasion. So, wanting your wife/girlfriend to act like a whore is just another extension of love-making, and dirty-talk can be a huge turn-on for some men - it certainly is for me. My lady will occasionally indulge me, but I get most pleasure from her pleasure, so if she doesn't want to do it tonight, I can wait until another, when she does. Go along with him when you feel ok with it, but don't be bullied into it when you don't. If he loves you, he will respect that. If you love him, you will want to do this for him now and then.
A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga +, writes (12 August 2008):
 Hi,
Firstly you do not do anything you are not comfortable with i would be a little disturbed too at this as it is usually followed through after watching porn etc; i think there is a great risk in every man of becoming self deluded with fantasies!!
What happened to good old fashioned hot sex does no one do that anymore?
I have never ever seen so many filthy shops that sell allsorts of gadgets, outfits, to SPICE UP IN THE BEDROOM!!
We are in danger of becoming obssessed by sex and how far do you take it?
I think secretly he would like a whore maybe he has fantasies of acting out etc; either way i think it is normal to maybe think about certain things you have never tried but i would never ever let anyone instill on me something i was not completely comfortable with fantasy or not!!
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A
female
reader, lexilou + ♥, writes (1 May 2008):
 Tell him you are okay with it as a fantasy occasionally but dont let it became a regular habit or you will find he cant enjoy sex without this roleplay. Dress up a bit and suggest a sexy waitress or something instead as an alternative. My hubbie likes me to wear my long hair up and my glasses on and act all prim and proper until the hair comes down then I turn into a dirty girl!!! Fun but its probably only 3 or 4 times a year. Dont worry about it too much and ask him to play out one of your fantasies in return x
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2008): Hi, this may hurt a little but it probably means that as a couple you are not sexually connected (otherwise he would be aware that its a role that you don't like/can't handle).Maybe he finds his love life unforefilling with you. I guess the question is do you explore this with your husband or let him forefill this fantasy/role play elsewhere? Until this happened, were you satisfied?Be comfortable in asking similar of him: you want a big cock/adonis etc and see if he would be willing to indulge you? If he wont then it is unfair of him to ask you to behave like a whore and leads back to your lack of connection/sexual compatability. Would he then be comfortable with letting someone else forefill your fantasy?I would be really interested to know how this goes.Good luck and best wishes
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2008): My husband does the same thing and it just leaves me feeling empty and less than enough for him. I'm not and never will be a whore and frankly think they're disgusting.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2008): I found this post researching how to get my husband to start treating me more like a whore an less like a "goddess" in the bedroom. Consider yourself lucky that you haven't been put on a pedestal and left there like I have.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2008): Actually, I like having my husband treat me like a whore sometimes. As long as there are other more romantic times it is okay. It turns us both on and makes us laugh the next day!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2008): Its nothing to do with porn or with trying to treat you bad. He is simply trying to act out some kind of fantasy that works for him, but for me it would also have to work for you too otherwise where is the thrill of you getting off on sharing the fantasy? Like someone else said, you need to find common ground on this by maybe softening the whore persona into a maid or something that you are comfortable with.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2008): All I can say is this is normal. Most men would love a woman to be a lady but a whore in the bedroom if they are honest. Just go with what you feel comfortable with. You should never have to do anything that is outside of your comfort zone. You never know if you let yourself go a little at a time, you may enjoy it yourself. You have to find a comfortable balance that will keep your husband satisfied but make you not feel uncomfortable. All the best.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2008): Sounds like a man that watches too much explicit porn or has actually been to a whore.
Don't help him - tell him to get bent! Would he help you pretend you were riding a hunky man.... I don't think so, he would be deeply offended that he wasn't enough for you. Dont be afraid to show that your hurt by this and certainly don't agree to it, you want respect over sex right?
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister  +, writes (4 March 2008):
 I can understand how you feel. You are a PERSON, not a PRODUCTION. Tell him this. Does he watch a lot of porn?
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (4 March 2008):
 Maybe I'm not at all qualified to answer this issue, since I have never hired a woman for the purpose, but I can ask a couple of qualifying questions. What exactly is required to achieve this goal that is different than good, hot sex? Should you set a timer next to the bed with a 30-minute limit? Why don't you charge a fee? I wouldn't know exactly what a "really hot whore" does, but it can't be any better than the desires of an eager woman or girlfriend, because the whore does not care about anything but the money, I presume.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  + ♥, writes (4 March 2008):
 Hi there,
I can imagine how this would be a little disturbing. I have the opposite, my wife quite likes me to call her a whore when we make love but I can only do a little bit as it simply isnt one of my fantasies .
But in your case it is so different, if you are not into it then all he's really doing is denegrating you in the bedroom, which is not on.
Tell him that you want to try something else out. I believe you could reach a compromise, a nurses outfit, or french maid who needs to be serviced? Just an idea. good luck.
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