| A
female
age
41-50,
*NM
writes: Thank you to everyone who answered my last Q. Maybe you can help me with another. My husband always pre-ejaculates and doesn't know why. what would his problem be. Maybe then he wouldn't be so insecure when it came to loving me.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, CarrieMagdelene  +, writes (5 January 2007):
 Hey! Good question! It can be caused by a lot of things, like nervousness, fear, and just by being overly-turned on by the situation. But it's also a medical issue that should be taken up with a doctor if it continues for a long time. I agree with Ponungalungb that masturbation certainly helps keep the ejaculation at bay, but so does vegetating in a hot tub for twenty minutes. Note that this also kills sperm and may inhibit the ability to reproduce as easily. Enjoy life! -Carrie
A
female
reader, Lilly223 +, writes (5 January 2007):
 I understand this 'problem' is probably very frustrating for both of you. Him because "it" isn't working the way he wants it to, and you because you really would like to do something to help him.
You don't say whether or not he is able to get a second erection and please you then, so I will assume that he does not, and will base my advice on that assumption.
It sounds like your husband may have a condition called erectile dysfunction. It is the inability to maintain an erection.
There are many reasons for this... stress, high blood pressure, diabetes... many many things can cause it.
But!! There IS good news! He can talk to his Physician about his symptoms and possibly get a medication that can help him maintain an erection if he does not have other underlyig conditions (like heart disease) that would rule out its use.
Two of the more common types are Levitra, and Viagra. Both are a god send if they work for him.
If your husband is not willing to go to a physician to talk about this issue, I would recommend you going with him as a source of support, or making an appointment with your own physician to discuss the best way to approach your husband and encourage him to at least get a physical to rule out serious health issues that may be interfering with him maintaining an erection.
If he is able to take this medication, he will feel like a new man, and you will feel like a new woman.
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (5 January 2007):
 Do you mean he cums before you have sex (premature ejaculation)? Or that he discharges some pre-ejaculatory fluid before you have sex? If the latter is the case, that's natural. If it's the former, he needs to relax. Maybe he should masturbate a couple of hours before the big event, so he won't be as sensitive, and he'll have longer staying power. Just my 2 cents.
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