A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:SO my guy has never said these three words "I love you." right out like that...Instead he says things like "Love yah lots!" Or he will tell his friends he "love yah lots!" then turn to me and say "love yah lots...more."Or if I do something stupid he will say "thats alright, I still love you." or if I do something funny he says "and thats why I love you."But he has never just said the words straight out. Why so?Does it mean he doesnt officially feel it yet or just testing the waters? Or is it perfectly fine how he says it and there should be no reason to ask this question? .Because before we both part for Xmas break I want to say "I love you." But I always heard to let the guy say it first...since hes said those others (but not those 3 words straight out) is it okay to say it?If you get what I mean... .
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNo I dont think thats extreme...I have read places that its a sign of 'testing the waters.'
So I want to be sure .
and I want him to be absolutely sure that he loves me before he fully says it and vice verse..which I know I do but ive read places that one should wait for the man to say it...maybe I read too much! XD
Another reason I ask is because I know I feel it...but its only been 1 1/2 months (though we were extremely close 2 months before) and another thing I read is that some people think thats too soon to know...but I feel it.
What are your views? Is there a right and wrong time?
A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (14 December 2009):
 With love, words are way F-ing louder than actions!!! believe me, actions are just little tipy toes baby. But there is nothing like getting your love accross and your answers straight out. No bullshit, and pure releaf to you. People have to stop being so afraid of love, if you feel it, express it. There is nothin wrong with that. People only get hurt only if the other person dose'nt truly love them back and then they start to run away (especially after a long time of being together) its really that simple. If that's the case then why bother setting yourself up with that type of person? But if they truly care about you they will listen but may not say it back at the same time or right away, those ones will stay and eventually they will say it. its that simple.
Do what your heart says not your mind. if he truly loves you too, he wont worry about those words. because he'll care and that means he understands and acknowledges your feelings.
The guy says it first? crikey! some of the myths you girls have lol ... just say it. BTW He already is telling you. I think he's now waiting for you to say it also. So next time he says it like the way he does, say it back. Like when he's with his mates and says "i love you more" say back to him like this: as much as I love you?, ha ha!" that should do it its soft and you can easily pull out of he freaks and just say you didnt realise what you said. plus its really cute.
good luck :)
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (14 December 2009):
 Actions speak louder than words, and it would seem from what you have said, that his actions surely say he love you.
I agree with cellardoor, he sounds like fun, but you know what, there is no reason why you cant be the first to say it, it might just be the trigger the situation needs!
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A
female
reader, Sadnat  +, writes (14 December 2009):
 he loves you, he might just find it hard to be so serious. my guy has the same problem, its usually i love you too or if i ask why he doesnt say it then its usually but you know i love you. but if we fight then he usually grabs me and say i love you so much.but your guy does love you just be patient.
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A
male
reader, CellarDoor89 +, writes (14 December 2009):
 You know what, this guy actually sounds pretty fun. I got a little chuckle out of his foibles. But seriously I wouldnt be too concerned... I understand where you are coming from but perhaps before you guys part for xmas break, during a serious moment between you two just tell him those three words and there shouldnt be any reason why he should be silly about it and say, "love yah lots". It sounds like he just wants to keep it light hearted and sometimes thats a good thing. Us guys can definatly miss the little things sometimes but I dont think he's doing it intentionally. Good luck.
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