A
male
age
36-40,
*CC
writes:Hi, I just got off the phone to my girlfriend and we have been having problems lately. She said the problems were due to her not finding me sexually attractive due to me not being 'big' enough. She said big as in how i was built and that I'm too skinny for her. She said she thought about things and only loves me as a friend. Does this sound like a valid reason? I think it is because I don't sexually satisfy her [I am 6 inches]. I feel ...empty. I really love this girl. Any advise would be useful, thanks. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, CCC +, writes (19 May 2008):
CCC is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your advice. I'm aged 21, but she is my first serious girlfriend and my first sexual partner. So i am very inexperienced. Well, we are on a 2 week break from each other at the moment, so that might have a positive effect.
I booked an appointment with the doctors, for Friday so will go over things with him. Which I believe will be cathartic.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008): You present as being over age (21) and from the UK. There is nothing to suggest that there is anything wrong with you. I think the problem is your too young for sex, and don't know what your doing (but that is only my opinion)
You and your girlfriend both have issues around body image, and lack self confidence and self esteem. You both need to concentrate on accepting your physical body, and learning how to love and accept yourself. It is not supprising that you can't keep an erection if your frightened she dosen't like your body, and she feels like an elephant when she's with you.
Stop (or reduce) the amount of times you have sex. Find activities that you can do together when your fully dressed and out of bed. Join a gymn together, take up a hobby, start studying together. This will bring you closer, give you skills, increase your confidence, and stop any problems you have with your erection.
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A
male
reader, CCC +, writes (19 May 2008):
CCC is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThis makes sense. I have been having some problems. We have only tried one position in 2 months we have been together. I'm not able to get erect enough to do doggy. And have problems with erectness all the time. Think i need to see a doctor.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008): they are right its not that you do not satisfy her sexually its more of a physical attraction problem. its not the size of your worn.' its how you wiggle it' size doesnt matter as long as you know what your doing
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2008): You have two choices. You can love this girl and change, or you can dump her and find someone else that loves you just the way you are.
Don't feel so insecure. It's not the size of you penis she's talking about. That dosen't matter, size is never an issue, it's how you do it when you getting down and dirty that matters.
She just prefers men that has larger shoulders, bigger thighs and love to work out in the gymn. She probably loves you, but your not the normal kind of guy she usually likes, and she can't help liking a different physique. I'm the same myself, but learned to love the quickness, and the agility of a smaller leaner man. You want her to go crazy every time she sees your body, then get a membership to a gymn. Bulk up. Read body building magazines, lift weights, get broad shoulders.
It's not fair, you shouldn't really have to go this far, but she likes what she likes. You wanna keep her then take a leaf from Arnie (Arnold Schwartzneger, that is) Build up your body for perfection and I guarantee you will have no further complaints from this young woman.
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A
male
reader, CCC +, writes (18 May 2008):
CCC is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice. I spoke to her today and she said that it was because she feels like an elephant compared to me. As she is a lot bigger than me. Taking a two week break from her and will see what happens.
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A
male
reader, Smiffy  +, writes (18 May 2008):
 Sounds like she is a complete B.I.T.C.H.....hard as it is, move on.....there is someone out there for you.....
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (18 May 2008):
 Six inches ???? OMG that is more than enough for a woman to accomodate..... What does she want a muscle man with a ten inch donger?????
Tell this silly little girl to bugger off and find a man of that calibre, she will find it very hard to find one.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2008): For a girl, this is typical. Kind of shallow at times. Keep looking, you'll eventually will find a girl that isn't a ding-a-ling as this one. Besides, she doesn't seem to be very wreckless with her tongue. If men talked like this, most women would jump down his throat.
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