A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:So I've been dating this guy for 8 months. He's wonderful, and treats me like a queen. Problem is, when I introduced him to my family, my sister did not like him. That, in turn caused a couple of my other family members and friends to question his character. He has been around them for about 2 hours total, and yet they think that he is not the right guy for me. I don't feel like they've given him a chance. The question is, do I follow my heart (which cares deeply) or am I blinded by love and should I trust my family? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, xSarax  +, writes (12 June 2007):
 The only thing you can do is ask them why they think hes not right for you. Family and friends care but sometimes they can be overprotective and from past experiences ruin relationships. If they come up with a valid answer then question your boyfriend about this. dont have a go at him though because he may not be aware of how he was acting and could have acted that way because of nerves. Don't let this be a big worry just enjoy being happy with your boyfriend. Best of luck x
A
female
reader, Clarey +, writes (12 June 2007):
 Only you can decide. When I was 15 years old I fell in love, but my mother decided that my boyfriend got on her nerves and the whole family turned against the relationship. I don’t know whether it was something about him being the first serious one, some jealousy about my developing independence and womanhood. There was a lot going on with my mother then, things about herself that caused her to do what she did, her actions were based on very superficial and selfish judgements.
It all fell apart, but we met again 30 years later and are so much in love and so happy that I am just in bliss. It really is an exceptional relationship and he is a very good man. My Mum feels very guilty, so she should. Whether or not this relationship is right for you, is entirely down to you. Remember what I have said, people’s motives are not always pure when they make these judgements. You may have to make a stand before they accept him, in the meantime stop asking for their blessing, keep everything to yourself and him away from them. Share nothing about that side of your life.
If anyone asks you, just say that it is private. Explore your relationship and decide for yourself.
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A
female
reader, Country Woman +, writes (12 June 2007):
 It does seem strange that your sister should take an instant dislike to your bf and 2 hours is not a long time to judge someone completely.
Did your bf act arrogant in any way or was he very nervous during this meeting?
Have you asked your sister why she took this instant dislike to him and what her reasons were?
I would follow your heart right now.
I understand that they are being protective over you but I don't honestly feel that this has been a very fair assessment of him.
Try and set up a family get together - a meal or something in very relaxed setting and see if they will attend.
If not, you have to make your own mistakes in life and if he isn't the right guy for you then sometimes you have to make those judgements and no one else. Your family are not the ones who spend time with your bf and see him for the person he is.
Stay strong eh!
BFN
Country Woman
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): I would say follow your heart you can't let people control you that way you do what you feels best and if you love him then stay with him :)
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