A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:well... i have a really stressful situation.... ive been going out with my boyfriend for 1.5 years now.. hes 23 and im 18.... im in my last year of school, and he's an english teacher... a few weeks ago, he got a permanant posting at my school!! he told me that we couldnt keep seeing each other, so we're taking a 'break'.. (because he cant have a relationship with students) firstly, i really respect his decision, and am thankful that hes such a caring person.. and hes doing the right thing.. but now, he's become the new 'babe' at school.. the other girls cant stop checking him out/fanatasing about him, which really really irritates me!!!none of my school friends ever met him when we were dating.. so no-body knows that there was a realationship... at school, we're really careful around each other.. but last week, i met him at our favourite cafe (by chance!) .. anyways.. he asked me how i'd been and told me how much he wwas loving his job... he said the only thing about it that sucked was we couldnt be together...but we would be soon (he hoped).. that weekend i went to a party, and hooked up wit one of the guys in my year... totally meaningless but he is totally hot, and is a nice guy... and at the time i was thinking "why not?".. of course, at school on Monday, everyone was talking about it... i had my boyfriend as my homeroom teacher.. and the whole time he was looking at me in a really strange/offended way... i approached him after homeroon and asked him what was wrong.. he just told me that he'd heard about last weekend and asked what the hell i was thinking?? he walked outta the room before i could explain and has been avoiding me... how do i make things right?? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, reign154  +, writes (25 January 2009):
Hey. I totally understand what you are going through. You were in this relationship with this guy who is your teacher and im thinking it was alot of connection( not just physical but mental to). he told you that you were going to take a break since he was going 2 b a permanant teacher and its prob becasue he knows that if anyone found out that there was anything between you he could lose his jobn reputation, and the only thing it would do is hurt you even more. But your 18 and should live your last year of high school having fun and meeting new guys. He should know that there are going to be guys your age that may interest you, and should be there for you as a friend(at least). Im in my senior year of high school also and last year there was a teacher who did some inapporopriate things to my friend and as a result the school found out and he was charged as a pedo and my friend transferred schools becasue both the teachers and student looked at her differently. I'm not saying that you should break up with him, but just cool it down for now. You dont want 2 only think of him when you are rememebering your last year of high school but how much fun you had. Just talk to him and tell him that he has to understand what you are going through. Hopefully he will and you guys can still be friends( just dont revlove your life around him, have fun while you atill can) I mean we are teenagers and are still trying to figure out who we are and where our lives are going. If you want to talk just email me. I have some similar situations but ill just tell you. BTW Class of 09 so rulez.
A
male
reader, Griffo +, writes (16 January 2009):
 If it was meaningless with the guy on the weekend then just tell him (teacher BF) that. He should get it clear. He for one should know that these things happen in your senior years anyway.
How long till you finish school? Is this your last year? if so I think he's waiting for you to finish so he can hook right back up with you. At the same time, because of these plans it probably hurt him a bit and he is worried he's going to lose you.
If you really want to keep him after you finish your high schooling then tell him that you want to be with him when it finishes. But make it clear that your only young and still want to have some fun with your friends. This includes a possibly meaningless pash or a fling at a party - which can simply happen just from fooling around and having a few drinks.
Let me know how you go :)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2009): Sweet heart why would you think why the hell not if you love the guy, I don’t understand that, I am in a situation where my boyfriend tells me that he knows I am doing things behind his back, which I am not, and even though that hurts more than anything else I have ever experienced I have never thought like that, only because I love him to death, speak to him explain how hard it has been on you and why you did it, be honest to him and yourself about this, as well as about your feelings about your future, be completely honest to yourself, cause if you don’t love this man like a faithful committed woman should then perhaps you should let him go, but if you can be committed to him and only him fight for what is yours fight for what you believe in do this honestly and you can only win the fight, good luck dear.
...............................
A
female
reader, MommyOfOne +, writes (16 January 2009):
 "Breaks" can be tricky. First thing that came to mind when I read this was, "But...I thought they were on a break?" Then, I remembered why some breaks end in disaster. Did you two set up rules for this break? As in, you can see other people, just no sex. Or, you both would prefer not seeing others. Rules MUST be discussed. I was just on a break from my bf, and still don't know for sure what he did during that month. Why? We never set up boundaries and rules...
You need to talk to him and tell him that, for starters, you thought you were on a break. And two, what does he expect out of you during this break. And what do you expect of him.
I don't know if I agree with teachers dating students. But, I do respect him for saying that while you are a student at his school, you can't be together...
...............................
|
