Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Curiouser  +, writes (11 May 2012):
Clearly your boyfriend is unreasonable and possessive. I hope you understand that.But, why do you think you have to do something just because he says??If he 'told' you to do something unsafe or illegal- you wouldn't do it, right? So if he 'tells' you to do something you're not comfortable with- such as this nonsense he's spouting about 'you can't talk to anyone else male?!' -you don't have to do what he says!Listen to your parents and your teachers; 'listen' to what anyone says- but ultimately, you've got to use your own judgement.TELL him if you're not going to stop talking to other boys, of course reassure him that this doesn't mean that you're going to cheat and that he can still trust you. But be clear about your own independence and know your own mind.If he can't cope with this, you'll have had a lucky escape- because this is no way to live. If you accept this now, your self-esteem could suffer permanantly, so stand up for your rights and don't let ANYONE walk all over you!
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (10 May 2012):
 His one teeny tiny problem is that he's a budding abusive partner. He may be a lovely charming, generous man with the exception that he wants to lock you up. That exception, alas, trumps the good stuff. He's not a good guy if he threatens or is nasty to other people in the guise of 'being protective.'
He's a creep, sorry!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 May 2012):
 "he doesn't allow me"
no you let him make the rules.
HE does NOT own you... he does not have the right to "allow" you to have friends or not.
either you tell him to suck it up and deal or you accept that he is going to keep you in a box and away from everyone or you end it.
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A
female
reader, eram  +, writes (10 May 2012):
eram is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks dear for ur help..On dates he is very kind nd so romantic..he loves me a lot..i can not describe his personality..he is such a great person..bt the only problem is he is possessive:(:(:(he helped the poor people a lot..he never ignore thaat person who need his help..his frnd nd people who worked in his office told me about him..everything is good bt the problem is he doesnt allow me to talk with any male frnds..
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (10 May 2012):
How is he when you go out on dates?
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 May 2012):
I agree with Tisha he does NOT trust you. His behavior is NOT healthy.
And why is it ok for him to be angry with others? He takes his anger with YOU out on them? This is NOT right.
This is NOT a healthy relationship... you are not a possession.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (10 May 2012):
He doesn't trust you. If he did, he wouldn't try to wall you off from the world.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2012): Hahaha yeah my boyfriend is the same copy of yours he's like talk to this and don't talk to that and no guys .. Bla bla but you must stand to it once he gets used to it you'll just be a toy in his hands even if he loves you so much he must respect people that you've known or people that you love
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A
female
reader, eram +, writes (9 May 2012):
eram is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks dear for ur help..my bf loves me a lot nd he also trust me..bt the problem is he doesnt want anyone to talk with me..when i talk with anyone he never ever says anything thing to me not a single word bt he shows his anger upon that person..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2012): sounds controlling, too possesive, you need to explain to him that they are just friends
does he do the same? are you the only girl he talks to?
if not then girl you need to have words with him!
Love is built on trust , if he doesnt trust you then thats not love.
x
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A
female
reader, Lissa12 +, writes (9 May 2012):
This guy has an unhealthy "love" for you. My boyfriend is the same way and I'm trying to deal with it. My boyfriend has my fb password and also checks my messages. But I stand up to him and tell him these people are my friends and they are going to be a part of my life whether you accept or not is up to you. They were here long before him and will be long after him. Your friends and family should never be compromised for any guy/girl. I'm 29 years old and most of my friend (even guy friends) have been around since I was 12! Your boyfriend is trying to seclude you and once he does that and u have no friends or family left u will only have him and that's what he wants to ensure that you will never leave him.. How could u if u have no one to turn to for help? You need to stand your ground
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (9 May 2012):
Not all boyfriends are possessive. Those with self-esteem and trust are not possessive.
How is not allowing you to talk to your other friends lovely?
Why do you accept this controlling possessiveness?
Why does he have your facebook password? CHANGE IT NOW and do not tell him what it is.
If he does not want you to talk to anyone he wants you for his own toy his possession.. this is NOT love..
He would like you to have NO LIFE but him?
Have you ever even met him in real life??
Personally I would run far and fast from someone who did not ENCOURAGE me to make outside friendships with both men and women. You do not need to be saddled with an insecure, immature, jealous boy.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (9 May 2012):
He's a lovely kind boy who doesn't let you decide for yourself what you feel is right and snoops in your Facebook? He doesn't sound lovely to me. He sounds like a controlling and insecure guy.
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