A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Girls: does your boyfriend have premature ejaculation? Mine (who is 25) only last seconds in bed, in fact sometimes he's cum before I've taken his shorts down (I can feel the wet through his pants) or even as I'm putting it in - its depressing and frustrating - what are your experiences of this? What can I do ...is it my fault?Girls: My boyfriends penis is small (I'd say about 3-4 inchs when hard, otherwise he's a nice good looking guy ...should I end it with him? ... [MOD NOTE: Two questions from the OP have been posted as one]
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): I have this problem of PE at times, well most of the times. I dont know what triggers it, maybe over-excitement or anxiety. But, I have found drugs to be helpful in this. And, whenever I try and relax during sex, it increases the time. I still have a very good sex life with my wife, who is satisfied even if I put it in for a couple of minutes, and then goes on to use her vibrator:) My point is, if you really love this guy, there are many solutions to this problem. But if you just want good pounding, he may not be your man afterall.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): Hello-
I am so sorry about everyone jumping on your back and calling you awful names.
If he is cumming so fast that you are not even getting his shorts off, then try something else!! How about telling him that you want to just touch each other with your hands? There are a lot of techniques that, with practice, will "train" him not to cum as quickly.
Have you tried having sex after he cums that first time? Does it last longer? Or do you just give up after that?
As another poster wrote, try google, have him see a doctor and lastly, have open, honest communication with him!!
I would bet he would like to last longer too!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): It's disturbing how quick everyone who has responded has been to judge the OP. She and her boyfriend currently have no sex life. Yes, it's not his fault, per se, but imagine if you were in a relationship with no sex life. Sex isn't everything, but it is very important in a relationship. You can't expect the OP to resign herself to not having a sex life.
To the poster of the question: Only you can decide if this relationship has enough redeeming qualities that it is worth working on. Try to let him know how you honestly feel without making it feel like you're blaming him for the issue. If he sees a urologist likely they can give him helpful tips.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): If you are unsatisfied with him, that's that. No amount of telling you to be more considerate or mature is going to make you feel better with him.But if you do decide to dump him, please, gently! Do not say or even hint that it has anything to do with his premature ejaculation and certainly not with the size of his penis. That would be very hurtful, and it's one of those things that guys find it very difficult to get over. So you have to think of some other reason, and it has to be a convincing one. And you have to stick with it. Even if he keeps asking you "is it because of my small penis?", keep saying no. If you say "yes" once, you can never unsay it.
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female
reader, kayla20  +, writes (1 September 2009):
 you need to come up with some ways for him to control himself there are exercises and more options maybe he should see a doctor.you obviously dated him because you had a connection and was nothing to do with how he was in bed at that time however sex comes with a relationship and if your unhappy you should speak to him gently about this im sure its frustrating for him also and could be a touchy subject but convince him to see a doctor
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A
male
reader, Zaph +, writes (1 September 2009):
ok first of all, no offense cause i dont know u presonally, but you sound like the type of person who just thinks of themselves, have you thought of him at all in this whole experience of yours? a couple reasons guys bust to quick is because their either excited or nervous about busting to soon, they need to relax and have fun basically but it sounds to me like he may just be under too much pressure that may be self inflicted work/school related or may be done by you or maybe he knows he has a small soldier and is just embarresed and it in turn makes him nervous....a faster heart beat equals a faster finish time, try maybe taking a couple sleeping pills and having sex, i know from personal experience it increases the length of it by at least 3 times, for me anyways...but yeah lighten up toots, way more things in this world to be worried about than small soldiers and quick races worry about how hes gonna treat you because thats all that ultimatley matters is that he makes you feel good all together vs. a hour.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): Why are you with this guy??? Are you just dating him because he has a penis and you want sex??
Sorry but you sound shallow and inconsiderate.
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male
reader, Dr T  +, writes (1 September 2009):
Not a girl but hey, I'll give it a go:
First thing is he needs to learn how to relax, there are techniques he can practise to delay ejaculation, like everything else: google it.
Its not your fault. You dont say if you guys get along well apart from this? If you are prepared to work at the relationship then perhaps you can calmly talk about this, your BF will feel low and stressed about this which will make thing worse. Maybe he is self conscious about his penis size? You can help by being honest: perhaps tell him that you want you guys to work and you want to help and you happened across this technique... make it fun to do together and accept that it may take some time.
Meditation, yoga and exercise are great ways to chill out.
If he can relax enough to delay himself then you can move onto his penis size, I guess you havent had sex long enough to tell if his size is OK for you. However my female friends tell me that their men come in all shapes and sizes, there is no hard and fast rule that bigger is better, some guys with small or average dicks are really good in bed. Like anything else in life: make the best of what you have! If you can get past the premature ejac. and start exploring your sex life then you may find that you can be good in bed together.
Hope it works out, at least have good fun trying!
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male
reader, galant  +, writes (1 September 2009):
 Maybe he has no good experience with sex and he is too excited. To be honest, no matter what other women says, PENIS SIZE do make a difference!!! I've experienced both and I prefered the longer one. If he cannot satisfy you sexually, then I don't see why you should continue to date him because if you stay with him thinking that you are doing wrong to him, you'll be frustrated just to avoid doing wrong to him.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): Oh, so you are in a relationship to have sex or are you committed truly? You seem to be a hardcore sex-starving-woman who needs sex, and not a commitment as such. Because, commitment needs love, and not regret. You should be happy with what you have and what you get whilst in a relationship. But it doesn't look like you are exactly headed that way, so I suggest you to visit some male brothels until you are like finally satisfied, and then come to commitment if you can dare to do so. By the likes of it, you just want some good, BIG sex - so go get it. DO NOT make a guy love you and then dump him just for some lack of size in his unit. That would be filthy shame on your part, lady.
People will not hesitate to call you a b****. Nor will I.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): It's not a reason to break up w/ a person if you love him, if that's what you're asking. Some men have this problem, primature ajuculation,but there is help out there. there is also a surgery that enlarges penis.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): wow you are lovely.
Sounds like your using your BF as a sex toy, you dont even mention that you care about him. The only redeeming factor that he has is that hes a good looking guy.
I think maybe you should break up with him because he can do better.
This might sound harsh but re-read your post.
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