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My boyfriend asked me how big/small his penis was compared to my exes. Does it really matter?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 July 2008) 7 Answers - (Newest, 4 January 2011)
A female Australia age 30-35, anonymous writes:

My boyfriend asked me how big/small his penis was compared to my exes. when i said i didn't remember he said i was lying. so then i said fine, they were all smaller, then he was angry that i remembered what their penises looked like!

why is he doing this? it hurts me, and he doesn't understand that.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2011):

Well, of course, it does matter because he thinks you might go for a guy with a larger penis if that's what he's thinking.

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A male reader, olderthandirt United States +, writes (31 July 2010):

olderthandirt agony auntWell, the answer I got was shocking and Iwish now I didn't know 'cause they wre all twice my size but she's with me now so who gives a rip?

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A male reader, meganutts United States +, writes (17 August 2009):

meganutts agony auntHe's got inferiority complex. He wants to feel like he's the biggest you have ever had inwardly though he may not say it. He wants his ego stroked and he want you to do it. If you really care for him, go ahead give it a few rubs here and there, don't lie to him though, let him know your happy with him and I size, reassure him that your with him and him alone.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2008):

I think he's really just hurt/concerned that you've had other sex partners in your life besides him. That's normal, but he's not handling it in a fair way.

Part of the problem is that so many guys think every man's lovemaking skills can be measured with a ruler on their penis. You need to try to dispel this idea to him. And if he really doesn't understand this, then he could probably use some info to be a better lover in the first place.

(I know a big difference in size can make a difference for some women. But you didn't say that his size was bothering you any, so I'm assuming it's not an issue for you when sleeping with him.)

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A male reader, oldfool Australia +, writes (4 July 2008):

oldfool agony auntYou're damned if you do and damned if you don't!

Tell him you don't remember them very well, you just know that his size was overwhelming so of course you noticed that they were smaller than his. HIS is the only penis that you remember in any detail. All the others hardly made much impression, except that they were SMALLER.

Tell him you love everything about his penis, including the freckle/mole/spot/bend/head/throbbing veins or whatever is outstanding. The other guys weren't memorable enough to remember a lot about.

If he persists in being an arsehole, you could always suddenly think and say, "I do remember one guy who had a really thick cock, actually even thicker than yours. It wasn't that long but made a huge impression going in. And there was another one that was a bit longer than yours, and used to go right in where I could feel it." Be prepared for him to become very sexually jealous and sexually aggressive, though! Probably not a good idea if you want to keep him!

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A male reader, SamuraiRick United States +, writes (4 July 2008):

SamuraiRick agony auntThe guy is a total Jackass. How can he get all angry with you over BS like that? If anything he should be happy you are not the size freak he thinks you are. AS a matter of fact you should just tell him is dick is the smallest one you ever seen just to get back at him for being as ass.

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A female reader, Tremor Australia +, writes (4 July 2008):

Tremor agony auntTry turning the table. Ask him how your boobs or your girly bits compare to /his/ exes.

All in all, I'd have to agree with q1605. He wants his ego stroked (among other things, probably), as well as making you feel bad in the process. He sounds like a bit of a knob, and you might want to reconsider where your relationship is headed if he's going to keep this up.

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