A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband told me yesterday he wants to quit his job, aged 45, and work in public relations for the Australian Army for 18 months.He works in sales and doesn't want to work from home any longer, claims working for the Army in public relations will be slightly better and a more secure job.He said it's not a dream job and it's just "I'm there for the money" job.I've nothing against taking jobs for the money, but this is an extreme, isn't it?We've been together 22 years and have a 16-year-old daughter.This is new and a shock; I've no idea how to deal with it.Is it a midlife crisis or something worse than that?I wonder if he's joining the army assuming it's "Action Man" all the time and hyper-patriotism.What can I do to convince him that the army is a dangerous job and also how do I get him to understand that it'll have repercussions for us as a family?It's a big shift going from salesman to PR for the army isn't it?I'm worried about things like PTSD etc. but he's insistent on going into the army in a role like public relations or promotional.Won't he be called to be a soldier at any time? (not well-read on military stuff, but there you go), or are people in PR in the army generally exempt from that?He seems to think this change of job means he won't have to work from home and he thinks he can quit after 18 months with that on his CV and get a good cushy government job in Australia, or a job working with a celebrity. He really wants to work in either, but the celebrity job he said would be more interesting and he'd have more freedom, plus his CV would be interesting (he'd somehow, via Facebook, put himself on the list of applicants for assistant to a young Australian influencer who's 26, she's not widely known outside of here; apparently the job role isn't a standard assistant, it requires specialist knowledge).He's been in sales for 14 years now.I'm supportive of him wanting to get out of sales, being in the same job for years can get boring, but not this part, I'm worried over it.I've tried discussing it with him but he kept ranting at me and saying that I'm too hyper and agitated, ironically, I was calm.What should or can I do to ensure that we have some long-term security?I'm in a job where I can't work from home anyway (I deal with heavy and bulky goods delivery or dangerous chemicals) and I've worked in that sort of role for 16 years now, granted, it's not an exciting job, but it's not boring either; effectively, I've got regular clients on rotation, run my own business, and working from home is impossible for obvious reasons; I outsource all the financial things to a friend who's good with accounting. Effectively people outsource things to me.I wonder if it's the wage difference and the fact my husband has co-workers and friends and a regular office, I tend to hire temps, and have no office, only storage for a huge Mercedes van and a Toyota pickup (the van is stored offsite, but the Toyota's on our house, so we've three cars on the driveway), that's causing the friction? I do have friends, but they're not friends I see everyday in the office like my husband did pre-pandemic.I don't even have an office, unless you count my storage for the dangerous goods which require sensitive handling.I really need your help and don't know what to do for the best.Please help me before things get worse.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2021): Isn't he too old??I really don't think the army will take him.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (14 April 2021):
 Working doing PR for the Army is not a dangerous job. He isn't joining the infantry. He won't get PTSD from working campaigns. He won't be going to warzones. He won't have to do boot camp etc.
But him working for the military might affect where you live.
While being in sales does help with skills in marketing, it's definitely NOT the same. Does your husband have any education in marketing? At all?
And working for some "influencer"? If an "influencer" can afford to pay a decent salary they will want someone who is SKILLED. Again, there is a difference between selling "things" and promoting people.
Can you afford to carry all of you if he quits his job to "try" something else? And for how long? What if he doesn't get the jobs he thinks he wants?
How much ACTUAL research has he done?
To be frank, it sounds a bit like a pipe dream.
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