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*te46
writes:Hi I don't know if I'm on the right forum for this but I need advice please..My girlfriend of over 7 years had a mental breakdown about Christmas time, her second in 12 years..I have no experience of mental health problems so I didn't see any signs, to cut a long story short here's basically what happened..She separated from her husband 11 years ago but never divorced,they had little contact thru our relationship but when she had her breakdown he took over, moving her into his house with no medical treatment for 2 weeks, I had no contact with her thru this time. After 2 weeks he rang me asking for help as she was suicidal, she came to me and took 2 overdoses of antideppressants..The ex husband makes no secret of the fact he wants her back and for a 2nd time took her to his house, I found out later..Since then she has been admitted to hospital I saw her twice but she didn't seem to want me there, she seems scared of me. Her family have now closed ranks on me, my girlfriend doesn't contact me and I cant see her..As you can imagine I am deeply destressed, we had a very loving relationship and she didn't get on with her ex husband but now he is her main support and I feel I'm losing her..The question I'm asking is when she recovers will she still have feelings for me, it's been nearly 2 months now, will she feel has she did before her breakdown or will she have feelings for her ex?The ex husband was a violent man who shouted at her and had mood swings, I gave her love but maybe didn't give her the commitment she needed..we didn't live together..All thru this she said to me she wanted him for support because he'd been thru it before with her and when she's well she said she wants her life back how it was, but I feel it's gone too far..I still love her ..ste46 Posts: 1Joined: Sun Feb 20, 2011 1:39 pmPrivate message
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reader, firstlovelastlove  +, writes (20 February 2011):
 You must be devastated to not be able to visit and comfort your sweetheart.
"I have no experience of mental health problems" "Since then she has been admitted to hospital I saw her twice but she didn't seem to want me there, she seems scared of me." I would say without a doubt she is heavily medicated and does not "seem" a lot of things to you at the moment. Don't worry, this is temporary.
"The question I'm asking is when she recovers will she still have feelings for me, it's been nearly 2 months now, will she feel has she did before her breakdown or will she have feelings for her ex?"
From my experience I would say your girlfriend will still have feelings for you after this hospital stay. Build on those feelings and create new memories. Be kind. Be patient.
I was married for more than 10 years and have been divorced for more than 15 years. My ex-wife has ongoing mental health issues and has been admitted and discharged from various hospitals over the past 25 years. I now live more than 2,000 miles away but still "do what I can" over the telephone. In the past she has asked me for relationship advice and I give it to her because I truly wish she would find someone wonderful to be happy with. She is a good and decent person but just not "the one" for me.
I believe your sweetheart's ex is it? This person should be doing anything and everything in your girlfriend's best interest to assist in her recovery. I sincerely wish you and your girlfriend all the best.
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