A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:All right, so I'm a sophomore in high school. Recently I friended a guy I used to go to school with four years ago on Facebook. I didn't expect anything to come of it, but we started talking and we really got along. We talked almost 24/7 over winter vacation. Now with school restarting, we're still talking a lot. I've never been in a relationship before; I go to an all-girl's school and am not used to being around guys.While he and I spoke, a little flirting went on. I've barely ever flirted and am worried that, since I have never done this before, I didn't really mean it. He gave me his number, and in return I gave mine to him, because at that point we were pretty friendly. Basically, I am attracted to his personality. He's sweet, funny, and I've known him since preschool, even though a four-year-long lapse went on between us.But the thing is, I don't know if I'm physically attracted to him. I mean, he isn't ugly. Not at all, I mean I think he could be defined as moderably good-looking, but I'm just not that attracted to him! I think there may be a tiny little spark that could one day grow larger for him. I know all about the "you grow more attracted to each other as you fall more in love" stuff. I just really need some advice here, because our talking has gotten to the point that I think he might ask me out! I honestly wouldn't know how to answer, because on one hand, I am absolutely attracted to his personality. I just don't want to say yes, and then not feel the same way if he tries to kiss me! I have never kissed a guy and want the first kiss to be with a guy I am attracted to. Help?!
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female
reader, lovemylove +, writes (5 January 2010):
Well good to know there is another sophmore on this site! I know people say that it isn't about the looks, but at this part of our life, it somewhat is. Not trying to be shallow, but I dated a guy I thought was somewhat alright looking last year. I did it because I had never dated and just wanted experirence, but I also really liked his personality. Big mistake. The personality thing wore off and I wanted some sort of lust to come in. But it was like nothing. So I broke up with him and I look back and wonder why the hell did I date him because he was not good enough for me. (Plus, he started to think he was 'all that') It was embarassing too because my friends would say "EW why are you with him" or "Why WERE you with him!" yeah...I am happy I am with someone I (and many of my friends) am very much attracted to.
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