| A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Throughout my life, at any given time, I have my guy friends who I hang out with, friends who are girls who I have casual conversations/flirt/hang out with, and then there is one special girl who I am open with and want a relationship with. The players change, but not the rules.Sometimes the special girl likes me back and sometimes I am her "special friend".Women, can you shed some light on this? As a man, I don't put tons of energy into a relationship unless I want it to go somewhere, but some women end up as my special friend they could "never" date. Some have mad crushes on me, then change their mind, and a few switch the other way.What I'm asking is why can women go either way with a man, best friend or lover, but to me, there is no other-sex best friend position on the playing field?Am I just a jerk?Please ladies, fill me in here.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (27 August 2010):
 When you say special friend are you meaning friends with benefits? I'm a little confused by what your asking. Are you asking if it's possible for a woman to play both sides of a man mixing the lover and best friend when we usually keep them in separate categories?
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