A
male
age
51-59,
*orino
writes:Her bf, a friend of mine as well, left promising she should join him. That is not what he told me. Since he left we started to phone and meet almost everyday. When I opened my heart and mentioned my deep feelings she answered we could only be good friends. A month later we ended up in bed and see each other daily. Her heart is split up, she now admits she loves me but still plans to move town to join her bf. Should I tell her he doesnt want her to join him? Should I stay close to her and wait until she makes up her mind? Or should I just stay away from her and avoid suffering?
View related questions:
split up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (25 September 2007):
 First, Who needs friends when he has a friend like you????
I think there are certain rules that govern a "good" friendship, and one of those is "thou shall not sleep with friends girlfriend." Neither one of you have any respect for your friend or his feelings. Here's what needs to happen, it's the right thing to do, and the right thing is not always the easiest.
You need to tell your friend what happened. He deserves the opportunity, by what happened to decide if his girlfriend is worth his time to stay with or not. If he decides to end it, it's his choice. Once she spread her legs for you, she lost her rights to the relationship with your friend. Tell him what happened and give him his right to choose to continue or not.
If he chooses not to, and she goes with you, a small piece of advice, think twice before introducing her to your friends.
A
female
reader, Emmajane  +, writes (25 September 2007):
 Complicated or what! Firstly her b'f should be telking to her, not you. You say he told you different, however some guys have a habit of being 2-faced, in my experience. Then you slept with her, and in your mind this means you are an item, whereas in fact you simply had sex, which is actually something else.
You don't say why he left. Did he leave the area, or the whole country? Is following him going to disrupt her life?
I think you should let her decide, and meanwhile keep your distance. No need to stay away, but I suggest if sleeping together is a big deal between you maybe you should stop that till she makes up her mind.
...............................
|
