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I've recently got together with my uncles best friend! But he is 40, I am 23 and he now wants to cool it a bit. I dont want to lose him!

Tagged as: Age differences, Forbidden love, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 August 2007) 5 Answers - (Newest, 6 September 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, *at23 writes:

Hi Everyone,

I am after a bit of advice regarding a new relationship i have started with an older man. I am 23 and my partner is 40, we met a while ago and have seen each other on occasion at my relative's house(he is my uncle's best friend!)I had not really thought about him in any other way but as a friend but at a recent party we chatted and i ended up going back to his place and sleeping with him! He approached me and told me he had been interested for a while and asked me to come back to his flat to chat away from the others who, obviously would have been a little shocked at the revalation of us seeing each other. I'll get to the part which i need advice on or i could be here all day!!

Everything had been fine between us but today he said he thinks things are moving too fast and that we should cool it for a while. i haven't spoken to him about it yet. i don't mind cooling things off but i don't want to lose him altogether any tips on how to do this??

thanks guys

k xx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2007):

The age gap is fine your both adults. As long as your both single. Talk to him and don't rush into it he may not want it to go any further. I hope he hasn't just got what he want and is moving on. Try not to drop your knickers quite so readily girls have not got great morals now and men will take advantage.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2007):

Don't hold on. Let it go. Find another guys who can make you feel good not just hurt you.

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A male reader, duce00 United States +, writes (31 August 2007):

duce00 agony auntDitto on everything hlskitten said. Ontop of that he is probably a little ashamed about getting involved with his mates neice whos 17 yrs younger. If I were your uncle Id be a little disturbed to say the least. These kinds of situations cant be anything but sticky because its so close to the family and hes so much older. So many complications...is this really what you want??

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A female reader, hlskitten United Kingdom +, writes (31 August 2007):

hlskitten agony auntHi K

Well he might be bottling it a bit due to your uncle being his mate?

He could be worried about the age difference?

How long had you been seeing each other when he decided to cool it then?

It wasnt just after you first slept together?

If he wants to cool it down a bit and go slower you can only go along with that i guess.

Depends what you're looking for in the long run. And what your instincts are telling you about this guy.

Like i said, its possibly just because hes worried about how your uncle will react.

Good luck.

C xxxx

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A female reader, Ileana United Kingdom +, writes (30 August 2007):

Ileana agony auntHey Honey,

Boys (yes even those that believe they are men) need there space all the time. Give him as much time as he needs just let him know your still interested maybe arrange a date then after that date let him ring you.

Play a little harder to get.

Nows he got you, you need to play more.

Good Luck

Ileana

xxx

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