A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok I can't believe I did this i never in the 21 years that I’ve been with my husband cheated on him. People on this page can’t think any worse of me then I think of myself. My husband is the first man I ever been with. I’m 38 now I take very good care of myself I work out I’m 105 pounds I don’t think I’m beautiful but I think I’m average I don’t have any starch marks for my children. People always tell me I’m pretty but I think beauty comes from the inside and a always try to be a good person I tell my children if they can go along there day and help who they can and not hurt anyone they’ll be able to sleep well at night I always lived by that rule so I'm beating myself up for what I did. 3 years ago a guy starting work in the same building I work in. I didn't notice him until about a year ago. I am the type of person who does not like to be touched by people I have a personal space issue. About a year ago this guy started talking to me flirting a lot of guy flirt but I always just brushed it off. Then one day in passing he grabs my hand and normally I would pull away and ask not to be touch but whatever happened there was this energy I liked the feeling. I always wanted to know if I was missing out on something so when he told me wanted me for 3 years know I was shocked in the last year I’ve been talking to him I didn’t realize that. He would always stare at me or look right in my eyes but he just got married I had no idea he even liked me. He only got married 9 months ago why he would marry someone when he wanted someone else I don’t understand he has a 2 year old and another on the way. One day last week one thing leads to another and we had sex. It only lasted 2 min and when it was done he said something very strange to me. He said he never been with anyone that tight before. He also said he didn't want to get emotional involved. I told him not to worry that would not happen on my part. Know he seem to be avoiding me well I’m kind of avoiding him to. I feel empty inside not only did I betray the man I love with all my heart but I fill like a slut and the way he acting makes me feel worse. Did I do something wrong when we were together that he didn’t like and he keeps saying how out of shape he is i think he fine he is a little overwight he was sweating a lot. If he likes me so much why is he avoiding me? And what the hell does that mean I’ve never been with anyone that tight. He Only lasted 2 min is that normal why is he acting this way
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2012): Well he Used you: plain and simple. Now that he took what you offered he's done a duck. What did you expect?Anyways was those 2 minutes of sex with the other man worth it? Was it worth betraying your husband? Was it worth betraying your vows? Was it worth becoming the big "A": adulterer???And don't worry about that "tight" comment. It was just words. So stop reading any more into it.You wanted to experience another man well you you have. Satisfied? I fully endorse Happy Places comments.LoveGirl
A
female
reader, HappyPlace  +, writes (28 May 2012):
 I think you should come clean with your husband, then you will understand the effects of your actions. I mightily diasgree with those who have said "say nothing". Your husband deserves to know what sort of woman he has married. You said you don't like being touched but you certainly opened your legs quickly enough and now you are looking for reasons as to why he said what he said. If you have a conscious, you will forever be plagued by this unless you fess up. However, if you have no conscious, then don't say anything and carry on living that lie. Is your husband good to you? Why did you do this?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2012): Here the thing he talk about emotions and not wanting that. But I don't think it my emotions he talking about I think he like me more then he wants to. I am a product of my life and I do not let people in I don't like getting hurt. This was support to be one night I told him if I was going to do this I didn't want just a quick thing I wanted to know what it would be like to have another man hold me feel me I wanted to hold him and do things with him I never did before like oral sex getting on him all the thing I have never be able to do with my husband. Just one night I now this was wrong.
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A
female
reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth  +, writes (26 May 2012):
 Forget this man, forget this ever happened. He's not worth it. Block him out.
I know all that they say about honesty but if I were you, I'd not tell my husband and risk losing everything we have built and shared together. Two minutes of betrayal is not worth a lifetime of loneliness. It will hurt your conscience for the rest of your life, but it will hurt your conscience even if you tell him. It's better to be with your love (and miserable within) rather than to be lonely and miserable. Because miserable you will be.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (26 May 2012):
 He only lasted 2 minutes ..... the lying cheating bastard probably feels sexually inadequate and embarressed by his lack of staying power.
You've made a huge mistake, and you seem to realise that.
What happens from here on is your choice, personally, with the hind sight of many years, I would just blank your colleague, if you have any evidence he is telling people about the mistake you've made remember, he is the one who only lasted a few minutes.
As for your marriage ... honestly I dont know what is best, is your marriage strong enough to recover if your confess?
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (26 May 2012):
You feel this badly about what you did yet you care about the words he said? I don't really get that.
In any case , being tight means that you were "small" down there, enough to squeeze. There no real deep hidden meaning behind it. I'm pretty sure he is avoiding you because he knows he did something bad which was what you did as well. Or maybe some other reason but only he knows. Is it really so strange?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2012): You made a big mistake. I am not here to blame you and make you feel worse because I’m sure you are blaming yourself enough. He doesn’t love you, it was just a fling and you are old enough to know that he was a player who won the chasing. He wanted to get in to your pants and he did. The chasing is over and he ignores you now! What should you do? Don’t say a word to anyone, never repeat this mistake again, and change your job before the rumors ruin your reputation in this company. How do you know that he won’t talk about what happened to other guys? Just move on and learn from your mistake………good luck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2012): He got what he wanted, sex with you. Now he's scratched that itch its gone away.
Focus on your husband,your marriage and your children.On being happy with your lot. The grass wasn't greener was it?
You do not need some sad colleague to boost your ego. Forget him and learn from this bad mistake,dont waste your energy wondering if or why because its wasting time on a lowlife who doesnt deserve it.
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