A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Do I just have cold feet? I'm finishing a divorce-just waiting for the final decree. It wasn't a good marriage, and I have no feelings left for ex.I've met a wonderful man, at least I think he's wonderful. We've been dating about 6 months and he's alluded to being in love..sometimes I think I am too..but other times...I feel like running away! I'm having a hard time with trust and this sounds trivial, but sometimes, I find him super attractive, and others I'm like...meh.I'm torn about my feelings. Sometimes I feel very romantic toward him and feel like telling him I love him...and others...I just want to shut off all communication and never look back.I don't know what to do!
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2013): Hi,
I found myself in a similar situation when I broke up with my fiance. I started a new relationship right after my break up and it was a mess. Not a good idea. You need time for yourself and be on your own before you are ready to fully date again. I broke up about a year and a half and I still struggle sometimes. Divorce and breakups are hard to get over with. I think that I am finally on my feet but I feel the same way as you that I can't trust people. I have a really hard time at trusting people again, specially because my ex-bf cheated on me.
I must agreed with the other comments. Break up and take some time for yourself. Date other people. Open your horizons. Give yourself an opportunity to explore.
Good luck
A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (13 November 2013):
 I agree with Tisha. This is one you just have to take a deep breath on and really see how your feelings play out.
You are going through a highly traumatic time in your life and I sense you are still seeking out some "normalcy". On one level you are leaving a man who you probably thought was going to be your man forever and now you find yourself with someone new -- all in a pretty short period of time. That can be a bit unsettling and I am sure it has given you a lot of anxiety.
There is no need to rush your new relationship. From the sounds of it, it has a very good beginning and it may just lead to what you are seeking. However, right now you have one foot in the past, one foot in the future and you are urinating all over today. Enjoy your relationship! Enjoy having a companion who is able to help you through this time.
You will know soon enough whether this man is a keeper or not and whether your feelings are genuine to last a lifetime. Just take it a day at a time and bask in the joy of caring for someone else who equally returns the favor to you!
Eddie
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (13 November 2013):
 Maybe just keep dating? Or if you are this conflicted and find him mostly meh…. then take a break.
I would say that 6 months in you should be in a happy honeymoon period, if you keep thinking about shutting off communication and never look back then this guy isn't a keeper for you.
Let him go so he might find a woman who is totally into him without reservations. What you are describing sounds a bit, well, meh.
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