| A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I’m single. I have been friends with a beautiful woman who is a single parent of three. We had a lot of good times together. A few months ago she moved out of the area. We kept in touch. She said that if I was interested in getting away that I should come for a visit and see the sights. We have planed a long weekend for me to come for a visit. It should be good. I’m attracted to her and would like to have sex with her on my visit. She has not said anything about the sleep arrangements. I just assume it will be the traditional arrangements with me in one room and her in another. Is it ok to consider sex with a single mother? What are some common concerns for single mothers in considering sex? How should I let her know of my desire in a respectful manner and ease the concerns? As far as I know her children will be there. How can I ease any concerns related to her kids and prevent them from seeing anything?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (4 February 2009):
 If I were you, I would just leave all these decisions primarily up to this woman and go with the flow. It would certainly be wise to assure birth control.
A
female
reader, natasia  +, writes (4 February 2009):
 Wow. Your approach sounds quite calculated!! And you don't say anything about liking this mother, or wanting a relationship with her - so it is just how to have sex with her without upsetting her or the children?!
I can't judge that - and certainly, she may be interested - she may be fulfilled and happy with her kids, but miss sex. And as for the kids not seeing/hearing - pretty obvious - just wait until they are very much asleep, and don't make a lot of noise, and be ready to pretend you're doing nothing more than watching a film in case one or more wakes up and walks into the room...
It is entirely a question of what she wants. If she just wants sex, she will no doubt have her own way of sorting this out in such a way that it doesn't affect her children. But it is more likely that she might think you wanting sex meant you liked her and wanted to be with her, which would involve commitment.
You need to talk to her, really!
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