A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I am in love with my best friend. She knows this, but she can't let herself like me because she has a BF that goes to a different college. I've told her that before we get out for summer break (Which is a full 4 months) I will kiss her goodbye. Our homes are 700 miles away from eachother, so we probably won't be able to see eachother until school starts again in late August. I know that kissing someone else's GF is frowned upon, but I've come to love this girl as a friend and as a sweetheart (eventhough she's not "my" sweetheart). I can't just walk away from her with nothing more than a hug...I need something to last me a long time. I know her BF would flip sh** if he found out, and I'm sure she would probably tell him about it regardless if she was ok with the kiss or not. This guy (her BF) is hard to respect since he's a pretentious a-hole (yes I've met him). Oh! And he's transferring to this college next fall, meaning that he'll have had 4 months to cool down after what I did (If I do it)before we see eachother...Is it ok to for me to kiss her goodbye? Is that going too far? Would it be smarter to just go for a kiss on the cheek? A simple hug is not going to cut it this time though...
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (18 March 2013):
 NO I'm sorry it is NOT ok for you to disrespect your friend because YOU want something.
How would you feel if you were the boyfriend of this girl and some other guy who had a thing for her insisted on kissing her even though you were in the picture and she didn't want you to kiss her?
If you can't bear to be just friends with her, then end the friendship. Otherwise RESPECT her wishes.
A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (18 March 2013):
 just hug her goodbye. that's what friends do, so treat her like a friend. she's with someone.
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A
male
reader, LivingWithBadDecisions  +, writes (18 March 2013):
 dude he might be the worst a$$ of them all but she doesnt care and she wants him not you. this means youre gonna have to move on now without a kiss.
Cooper
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (18 March 2013):
Don't be a loser. Being in love with a girl under the guise of friendship is lame enough, but ignoring her simple statement that she's not interested in you to go for a kiss which she doesn't want is even worse.
How about you go find a girl you can actually be with? You'll be much happier.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2013): Jeez you guys are right...I need to get over this
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (18 March 2013):
 You know that you can go to jail kissing people against their will, right? She doesn't want a kiss, don't kiss her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2013): I think a kiss on the lips would be going too far. You are going into her intimate zone if you do and by most peoples standards that is beyond acceptable for the level of a friend. She's your best friend, you have to treat her with respect.
If a simple hug is not going to cut it then you need to ask yourself if you can continue this way. You obviously want to be more than best friends but if she doesn't want the same then I'm afraid, to be blunt, it's not going to work out. I've been in this same situation and things just turned sour in the end, despite my determination and desperation.
How long has she been with her boyfriend and how serious is it? Are you in the friend zone? Is there any chance she would get with you if she wasn't with her boyfriend?
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