A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm sixteen, and been with my boyfriend for two years this sunday. For about a month now, he's sort of not really talking to me, unless I talk about making love to him on our two year anniversary....I know for a fact I'm ready, but I'm scared I'm doing it for the wrong purpose...is he still into me, and loving me?? Or is he just going to use me for his pleasure?? thanks in advance!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2007): "he's not really talking to be except when it's about making love"
That's the answer.
You can sleep with him, and of course you'll want this to signify an increased bond between you two but he won't. Then you'll be in a position to get hurt by this and blame him for "using you for sex," etc.
But once you already know just what's going on ahead of time, then it is your own fault if you proceed anyway and then get hurt by this. You've said you've got your suspicions, now do the unpleasant & mature thing and act on them. Go have a serious talk with him about what's bothering you instead of being led into bed when deep down you know something isn't right between you two.
I'm not defending him. But I'm trying to keep you from doing something that is obviously a path for you to be hurt & angry.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2007): Tell him clearely what your intentions are and what you expect from him and everything ll be fine and about your aniversary I dont think you should hesitate.If you are really in love with him,just do it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2007): It is not right to keep one thing in the mind and act in the other way outside.Better you have tell him what you expect and what you are missing.Talk to him openly.And you will know waht he is up to.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2007): If he is only really talking to you & acting interested in you when you talk about having sex with him...he is using you. Don't lose your virginity to this guy. He is going to use you & take your precious innocence then throw you away, leaving you feeling worthless. You don't owe this guy anything. Especially with the way he has been treating you.
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A
female
reader, iagirl +, writes (8 November 2007):
 If he is ignoring you now, he will continue ignoring you after you have sex...that won't change. If you think he is going to use you for sex and he doesn't talk to you about anything else, DON'T DO IT! You will regret your decision later, and you will feel like crap when he goes back to ignoring you.
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