A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so I've been dating this girl for two and a half months, and I think we're in love. Today she asked me to come over and to finger her, but I said I couldn't because I was too nervous. I know I shouldn't be, if we really are in love then she won't care, and she's told me that she understands. This is my first time, but she's done it before, anyway, how can I stop feeling so nervous about it? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, briah_love +, writes (24 December 2009):
don't worry reguardless of how good or bad you do she probably won't tell you if its bad..for me sex almost came natural because of all the crap i've watched on tv..just try your best and it will come with time..watch her facial expression and it will guide you..
A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (19 December 2009):
 just do it man if you dont in about ten yrs you will be regretting it just dont get her pregnant theres nothing to be nervous about other then that oh and her parents finding she said she wants you to then do it. it wikk get easier after the first time.
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A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (19 December 2009):
 The best thing you can do for yourself (and her) is to wait until it "feels right."
If you're in love, if the relationship is developing into something worthwhile, you will want to do more things as you get to know each other better. You'll do things like fingering when the moment is right, and when it will help to move you to the next level in your relationship. Doing it because it's expected, and when you are burdened with performance worries, is a recipe for a bad outcome.
And when you do get there, just let her be your guide. She'll almost certainly let you know how you're doing by the way she moves and by the sounds she makes. This isn't a competition to see if you can do things better than the people before you. It's an act of love to be appreciated in that context. If you're doing it in a loving way because you want to please her, you really can't go wrong.
Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2009): First of all, this girl is a HOE. Don't do it. If you have any respect for her or yourself, just don't do it. Trust me.Secondly, two months and you're "in love?" "In lust is more like it. During the early stages of a new relationship, the brain releases a hormone coktail that basically makes you feel like your partner is the best effing thing since sliced bread. However, it wears off in about 3 mos. to year, and if you've not got a steady and stable foundation built on mutual trust, respect and caring, it will readily fall apart.In short; get to know each other much better and build the relationship up before having any kinda of sex.
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