A
male
age
26-29,
*ix_Floors_Left
writes:Ok well a few days ago i posted a question about my ex and how i was falling in love with her again. Heres a link to that qestion which you may have to read to understand this one. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/after-a-difficult-break-up-i-still-love.htmlOk well that girl is going to be 1. The other girl i have to talk about is going to be 2. Just because we're not supposed to use names. Ok well i was completely in love with 1 a year ago as you will have known from my other post. we where engaged and prepared to marry once we where of age. I just left that out last time figured id add it. I sent her a message a few days ago on myspace and requested her as a friend. The message only said "hey whats up. We havnt talked in a while huh?" and the request said "missing you". Myspace is the only way i have to contact her anymore and it took me forever to find her page. Anyway she hasnt been on myspace since the 4th of this month. I knew this before i sent the message so i figured that she wouldnt even be online to read it for a couple of days.By the way this is something else to add onto my status with 1..The following is her about me on myspace: "Have you ever bothered to realize how much you mean to me? I care so much for you inside and miss you so deeply. My mind is always curious about the way things might have been. As days go by and time goes by, I look back once again. All the time I held you in my arms, I had the whole world right there. There you were, comforting me with all of your charms. Every little kiss from you was like a dream come true. This love that I have inside my heart, it all belonged to you! It's funny, all those little things I never thought I'd miss, Like all those conversations we had, or the first time we kissed. I guess that what I'm trying to say, is I miss and love you more each day! It hurts me not to see you, or not to know if you're ok. I want you to understand that I loved you from the start. And I want you to know, no matter how many miles we may be apart, you'll always hold a special place in my heart." Also her song is "Outta My System" by Bow Wow which was the song that we agreed represented how we felt about eachother after the beakup. All of this makes me feel that she is still in love with me just as much as i am with her. If this spark can be reignited... i cant even describe in world how amazing that would be...I didnt plan on asking this question but i absolutely cant wait until she gets online and reads the message because i am dying to figure out if we still have a chance to carry out our life plans togather. The only problem is that every day seems to go on forever and ive stayed up both nights since i sent the message in case she gets on late at night. I want to just be able to talk to her so bad that ive sat at my comp for hours just refreshing myspace, hoping that she would come online. I need to know what to do. Waiting isnt an option anymore because its killing me. But anyway thats one of two questions im going to ask. My second is that my feelings for 2 have been getting stronger. After the horrible breakup with number one i dated like 2 other girls but i really wasnt that interested in them because i was still recovering from the breakup. Towards the end of the school year last year i decided to ask out my friend who id known for about a year. We met because we both had a mutual friend (the same girl whos house i met 1 at). I met her at about the same time 1 and i hooked up but i wasnt that atracted to her right off. We have only seen eachother once in person and that was great but when we where dating i was grounded so i couldnt go anywhere to see her so i ended it because there wasnt much of a point in continuing the relationship.We still had feelings for eachother and we told eachother but we agreed not to date. Now she is my best friend and we usualy stay up all night talking to eachother. The problem is that when i talked to her about my feelings for 1 returning, she said that she still loves me but she wants me to be happy. Im not sure why but i always love to flatter almost every girl im with and make them feel special. I mean everything i say i just dont usualy say it because of feelings alone, i just do it because im a nice guy. But anyway this means that the whole time we've been apart, ive made it seem like i really love her which i wasnt sure i did. But now my feelings for her are growing and i might be going tubing with her in a week (which is a big deal because its going to be the 2nd time we've met in person) and im not sure whats going to happen.Shes already told me that she invited me because she wants to get me to like her more than 1 because... well mainly because i talked her into it. I just didnt want to see her regret her decision to let me go. I dnt know wht the hell i was thinking because now im stuck. I am 100% truely in love with number one but whenever i talk to 2 i get the same feeling i had when i was with 1. The problem is that 2 also has the advantage of being my best friend because i cant just hurt her feelings by chosing to be with 1 and not talk to her again. I just really dont know what to do. I know that i should give 2 a fair chance because i really do have strong feelings for her. Stronger then the feelings i get for more other girl that i like. But deep down i know that my feelings for 1 are stronger and she most likely doesnt have a chance...Any advice is apreciated.Thankxx~SFL
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2009): If you know deep down that your feelings for 1 are stronger...well thats kinda your answer. If you think she's not likely to have a chance you have to stop leading her on. Maybe its because you talk to her all the time and the fact that you are going to see her. You want someone you can actually be with.
I suggest you sort things out with 1 first and see where things go from there. If you want to be together again - great! If not - move on and think about 2 again...but not until you can give her all of your love.
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