A
male
age
30-35,
*resario2010
writes:I hate how women are so complicated, i think that everyone has relationships in the past that alter their veiws on other potential parnters, as how to act and how to behave and what not to do. I find that saying so true nowadays that women are so complicated, i'm close to giving up on women and jsut be alone forever, don't get me wrong i find women to be very great not only are they smart but they have a duty of bringing new people to this world and other things that women and only women can do, i dont hate women but sometimes just because something is great doesnt mean it still cant hurt you. i have been dating some girls and find them strange i can never read them, i'm a special at reading peoples intentions it is one of my gifts, well let me rephrase my quote i can read anyones intentions, excpet with women and relationships, for example i once liked a girl in school and she didnt like me i was like okay whatever and she even soon got a boyfriend and when a girl and she were talking in class she blurted out something about her boyfirend and she said that she was going to break up with her recently new boyfriend, I was like what you just got into a relationship with him just recently and now you are going to break up i was like she is just saying that to be funny i guess, but the next day she saw me walking and asked if i wanted a ride i was like you know confused to the core and then i asked her dont you think that your boyfreind might get mad and said i broke up with him and i was like okay, so then she started dressing up and looking at me like you know flirtacious and then i was confused about this because i thought she HATED me and now why are girls like this? i was so confused i decided not to persue her, and she even went out with another guy when she was liking me, i found out because her friend in class blurted it out and she looked at me and then looked back at the girl and said it was only for fun but i dont like him like that, the guy even stalked her sending her texts in class and calling her and she said this guy wont leave me alone, and then when i was in the computer room she comes up to me and said you need a ride somewhere, i was like swearing inside my head and confused like crazy i said no, and i kept away from her why would she DATE other guys, when she liked me? LOL girls are so confusing lmfao (sighing)..................women
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2012): OP women are even more confused than we are about why they do the things they do hehe. I don't mean that in any kind of derogatory way but most I've been with readily admit that there is no logic to most things they do and they can't explain why. The answer is simple though OP they very often will cede to their emotions and do what "feels" right at that moment, regardless of whether it make sense of not. That makes them unpredictable and that kind of spontaneity is what makes them fun.
OP the easiest way to understand women is to understand yourself, it really doesn't matter what they want only what you want and how you can get that from them. Don't confuse the issue by trying to figure out what they may like or dislike and then trying to conform to that.
Dating is exceptionally easy when you lose this will to figure them out. What's to figure out? You want to a bone a woman, you chat her up and try and play it so you get her somewhere alone. You want to date a girl, you chat to her and you ask her for her number and pursue her. Who cares if she likes you or not, or whether she likes guys who play sports or any of that other crap? Just be single minded in knowing what you want and how to get it, because in general most women don't even know what they want and are perfectly open to being told what that is. Even girls who have this idea of their perfect guy most likely aren't strict about that and can be wooed.
You will never, ever figure out what women want in general, they're all different and also what they want and what they do are very different things. How many girls do you know want a nice respectful guy to sweep them off their feet, yet the guys they end up dating are so obviously player assholes?
Finally who gets the girl in this case, you the guy who is analysing every little detail of what she says, who she likes and collating data and trying to figure out the best approach? Or me, the guy who walks straight up and isn't going to walk away from that conversation without a firm rejection or her number? You can read people all day long OP, I'm quite good at that too but when you like a girl all bets are off it's easy to read people you have no vested interest in but once they're a person you want every little gesture, body movement, every little details becomes a confusing "sign", best to shoot from the hip and take the woman you want rather than see it like a game of chess.
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (3 July 2012):
 You are comparing apples to hand grenades, my friend.
Most young teenage girls are JUST as confused as you are when it comes to dating/boys/relationships, it's something that has quite an odd learning curb. We do (for the most part) get better with age, not necessarily easier, but perhaps more predictable.
As for the girl you mentioned, I seriously doubt she HATED you. She properly had no clue what she felt about you and the BF she had those 5 minutes. And you followed your instinct and didn't pursue her, which honestly, I think was a smart move on your side.
None of us come with a manual. So, when in doubt trust your instincts.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2012): When in doubt, when getting mixed messages, get more selfish and stop trying to please them so hard.
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A
female
reader, Davinia  +, writes (3 July 2012):
I agree with you that most humans in general can be very difficult to understand and the opposite sex especially can be very complex. Past situations will always bare great importance with the decisions that are made in the future but it may be that you need to spend some time with your friends, relax and enjoy some good 'matey' times and then you may feel after a period of time you may want to start dating again. Remember sometimes when you are not looking the perfect partner comes your way. Be patient and do not give up!
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A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (3 July 2012):
Hang in there my friend - you are at a rough age to be chasing women - it will pass. For some reason, from the ages of 16-24, the human female can be one of the most puzzling creatures the world has ever seen. Its almost as you need to do the opposite of what logic would tell you. Want them to talk to you? Dont call them. Want them to like you? Be a complete jerk. Just seems to be the way it is at that age in many cases.
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A
female
reader, BettyBoup +, writes (3 July 2012):
 Maybe she doesn't like you THAT much. Maybe she thought she did, but when you showed no interest in her she moved on? A girl ain't gonna wait around for a guy forever. Not a girl with any self respect anyway. I guess back when you liked her, she hadn't noticed you in that way and went out with this other guy as she obviously liked him. Then for whatever reason, she went off him. Maybe when she got to know him she didn't like him as much, he bored her, or whatever. Then perhaps, for some reason she started to notice you in that way so started trying to catch your eye. But when you obviously were not interested she turned her attentions to her new boyfriend.
See, it's not that complicated :) Until a woman(or man) finds the "one" or commits to loving one special person, we will fancy a lot of people. And why not? It's human nature. When we havn't found our ideal mate, we will try to work out what kind of person that might be. To do this we will consider different guys/girls and be attracted to different people, until we meet that special someone to devote our love to.
So this girl didn't like you, then did, then didn't. That's life! Looks like you missed your window of opportunity to get in there with her, because you were offended that she dated this other bloke when you liked her. Well either you still don't like her or your do. I'm guessing you do a little or you wouldn't be writing about her on this website. So now she's moved on to another guy. Well, what do you expect when you didn't return her interest. She obviously thought you'd gone off her. And you kinda had, you decided not to persue her.
So now she's dating another guy but supposedly still likes you. Maybe she's trying to make you jealous. Maybe she just doesn't want to wait around for you when you obviously aren't that into her. Maybe she is trying to move on by dating another guy, but still likes you and hopes you will one day start to like her again. But she doesn't want to be a pathetic mug and wait around for you. So she's dating someone else. Oh and she wouldn't have HATED you, that's a very strong emotion. Sounds like when you liked her, she just hadn't thought of you in that way, but then later she started to fancy you. It happens! People fancy different people at different times in our lives. Love happens when you build a strong relationship with someone and love them and commit to them. That doesn't mean you will always madly fancy them and will never be attracted to another person. Humans don't work like that. Love is a commitment, not having a fancy for someone, although that does come into it.
Don't judge all women as being "complicated" just because one woman didn't act how you expected her to. Human nature, both male and female is far more complex for even the likes of Steven Hawking to fully comprehend. You can resent this, or just accept that's life and live it, and go for what you want in relationships. If you like someone, have a go at starting a relationship with them. But you cannot expect them to always feel how you want them to feel about you. If someone you really like, feels the same way back, you are a lucky person and should enjoy it while it lasts, however long that turns out to be.
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