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I'm not the funny, entertaining person whom I want to be.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 August 2013) 3 Answers - (Newest, 27 August 2013)
A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I really want to make the guy I like laugh, but I can't. We're friends and have known each other a while. I'm not sure if he feels the same but if not thats cool I'd like to be good friends. Thing is I've never been a very funny person, I don't think quick enough and I just don't have the ability to be funny.

I never have, even with friends, I've never had friends that I've been that connected to because there's always someone else in the group funnier and more interesting than myself.

I see comments on Facebook etc and how they're all laughing and joking and I wish i could make him laugh like that, or anyone for that matter. And more importantly to make them WANT to hang out with me. Thing is I never get the chance, whenever we speak to meet up its always basic "how are you" then maybe stuff we do have in common etc or when we meet up its for a catch up and a drink. We never go out and just chill or stay in and chill or anything, you know, those nights where the funniest of things happen and the memories are made. just think I'll never be good enough.. I'll never even come close. That doesn't just apply to him though it's anyone. And the reason being is, I never get the chance. Like I said we meet for a catch up I'm never there in a group to be a part of it.

I know people say be who you are but i actually don't want to be the person that I am. It really gets me down. I never get the chance to be that person, I just see everyone having fun and know that I'll never be good enough.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (27 August 2013):

Honeypie agony auntYou need to be WHO you are not try and "fake" it because you desire to be something else. It will just come off as odd.

I be you there is something YOU are great at, but you don't share with others. Find YOUR niche.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (27 August 2013):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntDo you lament, equally, that you are not an Olympic gymnast? ..... or a best-selling author? Probably not, no?

I suggest that you adjust your thinking... emphasizing who you ARE - and doing that the best you can....

It's OK to want to "be someone else"... but it can be unrealistic. Heck, when I was a kid, I shot baskets in a hoop over our garage door... and - every time - I imagined that I was playing in the NBA finals, alongside Bob Cousy, and Bill Russell. Wasn't gonna happen. HOWEVER, when I was in my 40s I became a basketball offical and spent lots of time with kids (and their parents) participating in the basketball that I "wasn't good at...."

NOT everybody is - or can be - a "card.".... but it doesn't make them any less of a person....

Stick with things.... and you'll find your niche - someday - maybe soon...

Good luck...

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2013):

well, if it really is something you want to change, good for you. why dont you try some self help books, also look at comedy shows, comical current events shows, sitcoms etc, thinking about how you cpuld make a joke inthat situation. be aware, you may mever become the funniest person in your group but its worth trying. also, people that are more knowledgeable are.often more funny, simply because they keep theor brains more active, and have a wider range of things to talk about, so why dont you try keeping abreast of current events, read more books etc. especially as you can find some ridiculous and funny news stories every day. good luck!

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