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I'm not priority on his social media

Tagged as: Social Media, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 August 2016) 8 Answers - (Newest, 7 August 2016)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

What do people think about texting a partner and them not getting back to you, but seeing they are on social media a few times, then they text you back about an hour etc later?

My partner does this and it makes me feel like he looks at his phone and therefore my message, so why doesn't he text back then since he's on his phone from the social media activity.

I wouldn't care if I didn't see that part, I'd just assume he was not looking at his phone, but knowing he is and just isn't responding makes me feel like social media is important enough, but I'm not

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A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (7 August 2016):

I have, nor ever will have, a Facebook or Twitter account, and am all the more happy for it.

This is example #45,654,332 of why.

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Australia +, writes (7 August 2016):

Aunty BimBim agony auntAre you texting "Help, an elephant just sat on my car while I was in it, and now my leg is trapped under the dash and there is a juggernaut heading straight for me" .... which really does deserve some sort of response, most preferably "hang on baby I'm firing up the gyrocopter as I text to come rescue you", or more just general chit chat?

Being on call 24/7, can be tiring, it can also be invasive if you just want to look at the latest pics posted of a hotted up vehicle or read what non PC crap your best mate from kinder has posted lately.

If it is important and requires a fairly rapid response phone him, otherwise just have patience, after all you say he does text you back about an hour later, which is not unreasonable at all.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2016):

Original OP here. No they aren't important as such, just chatty stuff or good nights etc on the whole.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (6 August 2016):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntPeople over 16 should know better than to judge a relationship by Facebook. You're a grown woman, OP - don't use Facebook as a sign of whether or not your relationship is okay.

Taking time out on social media and not replying to you straight away means he has a life (albeit online) outside of you, which everyone needs. It's healthy to not be texting back and forth instantly.

Judge your relationship on the relationship, not on what he does in between texts.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (6 August 2016):

Honeypie agony auntAre these important texts? or texts that "require" an answer or.. just you wanting to chat?

I think if you WANT to talk to him, then CALL don't text.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2016):

Social media is his priority. He responds to you when he's contributed to that. He sounds a bit immature. If you 'feel' second best then you most likely are. Dont ignore your needs. Watch out for the other ways this manifests itself and make a decision.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2016):

My ex did that with me , id message him ( like asking what time he was coming over but failed to tell me he was cancelling on me again) i saw that he had seen the message but didnt get back to me until the next day sometimes a few days later .

That really annoyed me because he would chat,comment and like things on his friends pages . If i asked him why didnt he reply after he had seen the message he would accuse me of having a go when all id done was ask a question. I couldnt put up with his flakyness on top of him ignoring me so in the end i dumped him and ive never felt better. i was always last in his life.

You could just let him make all the effort and do what he does read the message and wait a couple of hours to reply . may be a bit childish but sometimes its the only way to show someone how things feel .

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (6 August 2016):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntYour post raises lots of questions . . .

Are you insecure in other areas of your relationship as well or just in this one? Do you expect your partner to drop everything when you want something, or do you appreciate he has a life of his own as well? Have you considered he could be having a conversation with someone when he is on social media and not able to get into an exchange of texts with you at that exact moment? Do you give him a hard time if he doesn't reply promptly? Is it possible he is doing this to push your buttons?

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