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I'm having stronger feelings for my girl friend... am I bi?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 July 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 7 August 2009)
A female Ireland age 22-25, anonymous writes:

heyah everybody!

im getting really confused lately if i am straight or bi or even just bi curious..

i know my best friend for years and i am begining to have feelings for her.. i had an awful hard time with guys they treated me really bad and she was always there to regain my self esteem and confidence..

we are really protective of each other....

we hug,even kiss eachother in the cheek forehead and even hold hands and it doesnt seem to bother us.. we know we are close but im not sure what it means... she told me a friend (he) was gay and then said she may be bi herself and that made me thnking, she said that to me knowing id be cool and wudnt mind kowing (which i dont)and that was a few months back and now im having stronger feelings towards her.. shes also away alot with college and work.. im just wondering am i missing her and thats why these feelings are strong? please help me!

View related questions: best friend, confidence, self esteem

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2009):

Hey huni!!!!

Well, I dunno if it helps or not but i think that you should at least talk it threw with someone that might understand what your going trough, You mentioned a gay friend, maybe him/her...Not totally sure if it helps..but good luck love!xxxx

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A female reader, lilmizzbaybehh United Kingdom +, writes (4 August 2009):

heya huni u got the same problem i had 3 years ago and now i am in a happy loving relationship with a female.... yes we had out ups and downs but its worked out for the best....the way i knew i was into females is because i used to watch tele but wen i was watchhing i wudnt look at the men i was always looking at woman and thinking sexual things about them....im not saying u r bi because of this but your heart will be stronger than for females if u r and you will know ...if your having feeling for your friend then you should tell her let her know your getting mixed signals from hher and let her no you like her but make it clear u dnt want it to ruin ur friendship just ask her if she is feeling the same,......thats what i did and my friend grew feelings for me and now we are together and happy

gud luck hun hope it works out for u xx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009):

I also have had strong feelings for friends in the past. Also celebrities, radio djs and teachers. I have known since i was 11 that i was attracted to women, the best thing you can do is to think about how you feel deep down and if it is just friendship or if you have more feelings for your friend. If you do like your friend in a romantic way there is nothing to be ashamed of. Good luck in trying to figure it out. It took me a while to explain to my parents how i felt for women but im sure they will eventually understand.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009):

if you are attracted to her and you think you like her you mite be it is ok most best girl friends do stuff like that and are there for one another an the only person that know if youre bi is you i think that there is nothin unusual about any of that thats what best frineds do yet again if you like guys then your prob. not

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A female reader, orlandblm8 United States +, writes (22 July 2009):

orlandblm8 agony auntI know exactly how you feel! I was in 8th grade when I fell for mybestfriend. She was always there for me and what not.

I think the best thing for you to do is to sit and really think about it. Think about what attracts you to her,becuase if it's just that she's always there for you, then you just love her in a sisterly way.

Everyone is bi curious, weither they admit it or not, they've looked at other people and wondered.

If you don't want to do the first suggestion, you can just tell her that you are bi curious and the feelings arose because you have a strong feelings for her.

The most important thing you have to remember is to not scare her off. Because if you scare her away you lose someone who was very close to you, and you might not ever get that back. My advice is to tread lightly because you never know what going to happen.

In my case when I told my friend, she talked to her mother about it, and she said that she shouldn't date someone or think of being gay just because someone likes them. Since then, she has come out Bi, and her Bi part is reserved for me.

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