A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay guys, I love this sight for your answers to my questions - Now PLEASE Help!!!!Okay, today I was in a store with my mom and I saw my friend whom I haven't seen in a VERY long time and in that duration of long time, we both had a thing for each other. Lets call him D-factor.And well I still have some feelings for D-factor and he does for me even though we are BOTH not single. I love my boyfriend so much and I just dont know what to do about D-factor. He was my first big time thing for a guy.Please help me guys, like, ASAP. Because I'm hanging out with D-factor tomorrow!! Ahh! Help!!! thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, stina  +, writes (4 October 2007):
 Hello there,
Sorry - I didn't check this until now - I usually follow up on responses by original posters, but since you're not registered I didn't know.
You said "Stina your comment actually really hurt me." Sorry. What about it hurt you? What did I do that was uncalled for?
Well, hopefully you didn't hang out with D-Factor. The main reason I say this is because you said "But the thing im worried about most is if D-Factor tries anything with me... hes a REALLY big guy and i couldnt fight him off." This does not sound like a position you should put yourself in.
It also would have helped to hear the details - such as your boyfriend knowing about D - in your original post.
It really sounds like you and your boyfriend have some issues to work on. Why are you both hanging out with people who are trying to possibly get in your pants? (If you want to do that, I suggest that all of you get together instead of seperatly.)
But I really would like to know what I said that offended you. I've reread my answer several times and cannot see where you'd think I'm out of line. Thanks!
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (29 September 2007):
 Take this to heart:
Never leave someone you love for someone you like because someone you like will leave you for someone they love.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2007): No No you Guys Dont Understand Especially You Stina, I Told My Boyfriend And He Said It Was All Good
(he doesnt really care because im a big tomboy and cant stand hanging out with girly girls and all that and most of my friends are guys)
Stina your comment actually really hurt me, that was completely uncalled for, but to elaborte MORE on it, my bf was going to hang out with a girl who's trying to take him away from me yesterday, and yesterday when i saw D-Factor i made plans EVEN BEFORE I KNEW MY MAN WAS HANGING AROUND SOME CHICK WHOS TRYING TO STEAL HIM FROM ME. Then when i called my man he told me this so i was like wtf? But the thing im worried about most is if D-Factor tries anything with me... hes a REALLY big guy and i couldnt fight him off... so i dont know what we could do to still hang out but not get close...at all...
and yes i love my bf i love him so much i just dont know if i should hang out with D-Factor even though he's one of my best friends...
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A
female
reader, stina +, writes (27 September 2007):
Hello Anonymous,
Why are you hanging out with your crush if you have a boyfriend? Did you tell your boyfrien that you'll be hanging out with this other guy? If not, why? Because you think it may lead to your boyfriend getting upset? Because you are thinking that you might hook up with your crush?
I think you either owe it to your guy to tell him what's going on or cancel your plans with this other guy. I don't think what you're doing to your boyfriend is very fair, do you?
How would you feel if he was meeting his crush behind your back? You'd probaby feel like crap. And you'd probably get angry.
If you care at least a little bit about your boyfriend, have the decency to take his feelings into consideration. If you don't want to do that, then I think it's time that you pull out of the relationship. It's obvious that if you are crushing on someone else, then you aren't ready to be in a committed relationship.
Figure out who you want, pick ONE, and then go on with your life.
Take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2007): Basically, you can't have your cake and eat it! (Well I suppose you could, but disaster will lie around the corner). Someone will get hurt. You've got to choose one or the other.
Two-timing is not a good trait in a girl!
Phil
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A
female
reader, terrifenby  +, writes (27 September 2007):
 every one will always hold a torch for thier first love, but you need to remember that if you went back to him it might not be the same as what it used to be! you say youreally love your current boyfreind, sop compare the feelings you have for both guys and make your chioce! but dont lead them on tell one of them straight, if you meet this boy tomorrow and end up doing things you shouldnt then you have made your choice! if you dont want to lose you boyfreind stay away
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