A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am afraid I'm in love with my first cousin. I think he feels the same way but when he tells me he loves me in text messages and emails I am afraid to question it. We have been seeing eachother intimately for 4 months now. We have known each other since we were young because of our family ties but we never really knew each other and have spent very little time together as adults until recently. He has never been married and has no children. I am divorced and have two boys in late teens early twenties. We dont have to worry about wanting to have kids. I would like to have him for ever and for real. When we had some time alone after a small family function last year we had a really nice hug and we both felt the electricity. Later we talked about it and ended up confessing our many years of crushes and fantasies for each other. Ever since then we have been getting together whenever possible even though we are 100 miles away from each other and have busy schedules. I thought it would feel weird at first but it feels so wonderful to be with him, I just want more and more. He has made comments about being together forever, marrying me and living together in the future but we both know it would be too difficult right now. I dont even know what to say when he says those things. This is really the best relationship I have ever had as far as how well he treats me and how much I feel loved around him. There are complications.....can it ever be out in the open?
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female
reader, PixiePie  +, writes (15 January 2011):
 to anonymous below... downs syndrome isn't caused by close genes (ie cousins) it is cause by a rogue gene, so your point is void.
Cousins can and do have children, and as long as you are careful (get tests done before falling pregnant, its called genetic councelling) then there is nothing wrong with it.
The happiest relationships i know are cousins.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2011): Very sticky situation I would stay away from him and really think if I truly love him and think about if you ever had children with him? My neighbor married her first cousin and both of her children came with down syndrome and I don't see that they are happy together the children are very antisocial. I know you are not looking to have children with him but it could happen even if you do take care of your self. What if later on he wants children of his own????
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2011): A first cousin is weird (for me) because our families are really close. I'm referring to a first cousin as in e.g. his mother is the sister of my mother. I have a really hot first cousin, I always compliment him how proud I am to have the hottest cousin and bla bla bla, I could never see him as a lover.However, in our families, we've had second cousins hooking up, even marrying. Second cousins is e.g when his grandfather is your grandmothers brother, so you both have the same great grandparent. In this case my family took it very well, although sometimes at parties they get teased a bit, but nothing cruel though.I have also had a crush on my father's cousins, and can definetely see them as lovers. In this case the father of the guy is my grandmothers brother.I would say you are both adults, grown men and women, if your love is mutual, I would say go for it, life is too short for shoulda coulda woulda's
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A
male
reader, EPocket  +, writes (14 January 2011):
 why not sweetie ..
love seed been plant long time ago and guess its getting bigger now . just follow ur heart and it will lead you :) but remember the man comes as close as u allow him . and no one would ever be able to tell u how serous he is. only you know.
to me seems it gonna be a good move for u
wish u luck :)
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A
male
reader, Dataluke +, writes (14 January 2011):
 I was in the same situation once a few years ago, but as a teenager something like that isn't practical. As for you, it may just be possible.First thing to do is establish whether your both sure that this is what you want, cause this is going to be a big change to your lives as well as the lives of your families.Next step is to make plans about moving closer together or even into the same place. Once this is done you can inform your family. Make sure you both tell them together but down play how big a deal it is, your family will start a small uproar otherwise.Start off slow and build a life for yourselves. Your family won't be very accepting for a while so take it slow with them as well.With this kind of thing you have to figure out what's good for you, but to answer your question, it is very possible for this to happen.I hope it works out well.All the best, Dataluke
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