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I'm a quiet shy type, and gay, and I worry about things

Tagged as: Dating, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 December 2009) 0 Answers - (Newest, )
A male Australia age 51-59, anonymous writes:

sorry fr the length, need help.

I think ihave s****** things up a bit.

Im a quiet, no gay scene non drinking, shy gay female and have hardly any freinds, only a few straight freinds, only one knows im gay. Im a shift worker so its very very hard for me to committ to a regular event due to my work,

I have been on an internet dating site for years and over the past 2 years have met quite a few, maybe 10-13 women for coffee and to chat. As expected when meeting a perfect stanger, when we met it was a bit weird and in some cases we didnt get along well at all, and sometimes it was a "nice chat" and then saying bye and wishing each other well, that led nowhere. Meeting in person and talking online is so different, as expected. There was one woman that i thinked liked me, i may have got some flirty vibes from her.. after meeting she texted me back saying "lets do this again, good to meet you" i got a bit freaked out. i wasnt attracted to her and only saw her as freind.

As im quieter and am used to my own space, after meeting a few days later, i sent her a messge via the web site, saying "nice to "meet you, lets catch up again as freinds" and i told her that as my work hours are weird its hard for me to meet regularly,and thats i liked meeting her. yes i made an excuse! but..i wanted to meet as freinds! and i DID NOT flirt when we met, i dont know how to do that. im queiter and shy.

Well this offened her cos i never heard from her again.. I tried to contact her via the website 10 days later but on her profile there was a comment about only wanting to meet "genuine ppl due to a recent bad expereince" which i know was directed at me. I was genuine and i was nice,maybe i gave off the i like u vibe, didnt mean too.

im thinking of going to a lesbian social group to meet ppl and i know shell be there. I never go anywhere and this is a big deal to me.

What if she has bad mouthed me to other ppl from the site(small site) that dont even know me, told them im a player? how do i deal with this? im not a player!

I just want to meet new ppl and make some freinds, i have no freinds and i dont need her saying s*** about me, she doesnt know me, and we only met for an hour long coffee!

help plse. how do i fix this and what can i do if i hear bad stuff about me via someone else? do i conatc her again,

its been 6 months now since we met.

thanks

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