A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi i have a problem i was ment to meet up with a old friend i knew as a teenager she was going to ask her mum to baby sit on thursday (today) but she told me this on tuesday now she has asked her mum and she said she can't because of work in the morning which i understand but why did she have to wait to ask her now why not ask her on wednesday she (her mum) only lives around the corner and she said she can't get her sister to baby sit coz she is out but if she really wanted to meet would she not of asked her mum or sister to baby sit earlier? i was ment to meet up with her twice befor but things on her end came up i suppose my question is am i reading to much in to this or does she just not want to meet if she doesn't want to meet then why not just say because its all ways me whos askes her to meet all she has to say is i don't want to meet right?it just feels to me that she knew that her mum would say no and waited for her sister to go out so she would have a excuse instead of just saying "no i don't want to meet" Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, largentsgirl89  +, writes (14 January 2011):
 You know, sometimes things just do come up and perhaps that is the case here. Women, most of the time, don't want to come across as mean or hateful so we tell you that we get caught up or things came up, etc.
Ask her. Do you want to meet up? It's okay if you don't. I will understand, you just need to tell me so we can both go on. She should answer honestly.
A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (13 January 2011):
 hi
do you mean meet for a date or just as mates? as its always you who asks to meet, i think she probably doesn't wanna meet but she feels awkward just saying 'no' or doesn't want to offend or upset you. stop asking her, wait to see if she asks you. if she doesn't, at least you will know where you stand. or she could be genuinely having a problem getting her mum or sister to babysit, if that is true she should really let you know as soon as she knows instead of leaving you dangling. it makes her seem like she doesn't think your time is important
xx
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A
male
reader, Dataluke +, writes (13 January 2011):
 It does seem odd doesn’t it? The way I see it, you can do one of two things.
First, you can arrange to meet her one last time. Let her pick the location and the time, and make sure you give her some small reminders leading up to the appointment. If she shows up then you’re fine, if not then it’s best not to talk to her, she obviously doesn’t want to know.
Or you can just ask her, point blank, up front, is she honestly avoiding you? And you can do what you like based on her response, but don’t yell, no one likes yelling.
All the best, happy reunion if it works out
Dataluke
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2011): The best way to find out would be to ask her. Maybe she doesn't want to hurt your feelings. Or maybe she has many other stresses and she didn't want to meet for other reasons. Why don't you suggest doing something with her and the baby if that is possible?
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