A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:i am only 11 and i am single.wich im not happy about. also recently i have wanted sex loads. ihave been thinking that i will find a boyfriend, go to his house one day and he will ask me for sex with comdoms and i will say yes......in my dreams.and i havnt started my periods yet so i wont get a baby or anything. and i have just started having the sex education at school so i know how to have safe sex. plz help im in agony.if you have any tips plz post them as well.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2008): Thank you for the update, that was very kind of you, and I know that your decision has made me and many of the other aunts and uncles very happy. It's normal to have sexual thoughts and want to be intimate with someone, but at a young age it's not really a very sensible thing to do. Time will pass quickly, it did for many of us. Soon you too will be an adult, with bills, responsibilities, and troubles, but hopefully you will also be in a loving relationship with someone who is special to you. Really good sex is better when you are in love and you are loved back. Take care of you always. Blessings.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you, i really needed that wake up call, ive now deffinatly that i will not consider sex for 5 years maybe even longer, but thank you all for your help!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2008): Sorry dear caller, I've just seen your update, and it seems your not so stupid after. I apologise, now I understand you were just telling us about your feelings and have no intention of doing anything. That's great, you've made a wise decision. I wish you well and good luck, remember to always take care of you and keep yourself safe.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2008): Your 11 and single.... poor you. Perhaps if you talk to your mum about the way your feeling she could give you some advice.
I should forget about the sex thing though, not a good idea. Leads to all kinds of diseases and things.
My advice to you is to forget about boys and sex, because your too young. My tip is to get yourself an education and study hard at school, because you are REALLY, REALLY, DUMB...... "I'
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A
female
reader, x-kitycatlok-x +, writes (5 July 2008):
 Right then, this is an opposite argument for all of the comments. I am now 14 years old, and I have had those same feelings since I was about your age. I've only recently had a boyfriend who I feel I loved dearly, and I did give my virginity to him. Even though things didn't work out for me and my boyfriend, I do not regret that day at all. I know a couple of years seems like a long time, but they really do fly by and you will find someone who things you're so special that you will want to give yourself to them. That is what sex is about. It's a way of showing your love, however do not do it to prove it, and certainly don't do it just for the hell of it.
Wishing you the best
xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for all your help and support and i now have thought differently.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): its normal to have these feelings, however you're way to young to start having sex. wait until you find the right guy and wait until you get older.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): I am sure you must have lots of friends; and you know what at your age; vow, it is great to be single and have friends; you can still enjoy picking which one is nicest, and you can change your mind every so often, without having to feel quilty or explain or hurting feelings;
I think you are way to young to even think about having sex; in fact anybody no matter how old they are; that will have sex with you now; will be in trouble with the law; it will be consider child abuse, rape and all of that; the person will be criminally charged;
I am sure you don't want that to happen; and trust me even if you think, nobody will find out; these things do come out; the boy tells a friend who tells a friend who tells a teacher or a parent and then you are dragged into a big mess; also your body is still developing; you need to wait a few more years; give your body time to grow and develop; enjoy being young and single; have friends; hold hands and kiss, but not more then that; there are lots of things going with sex, not just the physical act;
Why don't you one day sit down and talk to your mom about sex; have you ever considered doing it; you might be scared, but I bet, she will be more then willing to tell you and share some valuable information with you;
there are lots of risks and responsibilities and things to take in consideration; don't even stress yourself about it yet;
Hey, go and have fun with your friends; leave the sex for a few years; talk and get more info, BUT don't do it;
Best wishes
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): Every one has sexual feelings however... What do you want for your life? You are worth so much as a person. Sex is only a small part of life. So be smart about it, wait for someone who shows you respect and wants to know you. Don't let this one thing get you pregnant, dropped out, on minimum wage, prescriptions for std's to combat the blisters that sting your most sensitive areas. Sex will be great for you when you are ready, but don't be stupid about it. Treat your body like it is truly special, not a special offer at walmart. Self control will make the experiences you have more rewarding in the end.Talk to a school counselor about it.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): The idea that a guy would want to have sex with you probably feels like it's a sign of love for you.But it won't be. You can't get a guy with sex, and you can't keep a guy with sex. If he doesn't like you already without it, then you will only become his plaything by giving him sex. His toy. Learn this hard lesson now, and it will save you a lot of grief in your life. Guys are just different in the brain about sex. It's natural. They don't feel like it's any automatic sign that they like a girl just because they want to sleep with her. It's not love to them like it feels to you. (It can be that important to them, but it doens't have to be at all. Not like it is with women.)
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (5 July 2008):
It's perfectly normal to feel this way at your age. It's because puberty has hit you like a tonne of bricks and your hormones are going WILD!
However, the idea of sex and boyfriends are very very different from the real thing.
Everyone else has already had a go at you for being so young, and they are right, you shouldn't act on these feelings. Stay single, watch and learn about boys but don't do anything with them for a good few years yet. They are far too immature to treat you right, and you don't want to look back at your first time and know it was with some stupid little boy who was horrible to you.
Good Luck!! xx
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male
reader, Peterk5699 +, writes (5 July 2008):
 Yeah, it's been said before but I'll say it again: You are waaaayyyyy too young to even consider having sex.Like others have said it isn't all perfect. You should wait til you find the right person and when you are above the legal age (16 in this country).There are many, many guys out there who would happily take advantage of a girl as young as you. You'll come to realise this.We all have had our fantasies, that's fair do's but fantasies aren't all how they turn out to be if that makes sense.In the next 5 years you should concentrate on your school work and enjoy your time while you can because when you hit 16 the world will become a harder place to work with. Not to scare you or anything, just speaking from experience being 20.Good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): Why do you feel you need sex so badly? Why are you in agony? You do realise that you are too young, not only legally but physically and mentally too. It's such a lot for you to cope with. There are so many other things you should be occupying yourself and your mind with. If you really feel that bad and I really can't imagine that you do, try masturbation as a means of relief.
I can't believe I'm advocating this to a kid but if it saves you from the horrors that underage sexual activity will bring, then I suppose I'm justified.
I just know you will receive a flood of messages from aunts telling you 'no' - I'll leave it to them to tell you exactly why not too. Listen to them!
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